tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post913809219326523938..comments2023-05-10T02:47:51.886-07:00Comments on GOSSELINS DO NOT NEED OUR PITY: Does Kate Play Enough? Do You?Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger48125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-26407126146702811322009-02-13T10:27:00.000-08:002009-02-13T10:27:00.000-08:00Maria said...All in all, I have noticed that some ...<B> Maria said...All in all, I have noticed that some kids whose parents constantly play with them seem to have trouble being alone or finding ways to entertain themselves. I think it's great for parents to interact with their kids all day--talk to them, give them guidance on things to do, provide crafts supplies, make sure they are supervised, etc, but I really don't think it's my role to be the "playmate." </B><BR/><BR/>Good point. I agree being present and available is more important than actively participating in games with your children. If that's your thing and you enjoy it, wonderful, but as long as a parent is available to supervise or provide guidance (even if one's butt is firmly planted in a white plastic chair LOL), I think you are doing just fine...Anya@IWhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10277215288731619588noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-23902217274803283562009-02-13T09:37:00.000-08:002009-02-13T09:37:00.000-08:00My mom did not play with me, my dad did sometimes....My mom did not play with me, my dad did sometimes. I am 40 years old, I have a 9 yr old girl and 5 yr old boy. I will play a board game most days, or play Wii bowling, or do her doll's hair, but for the most part, I feel that she should go out and play with neighborhood friends/her brother. My 5 year old son is a very dedicated lego enthusiast, and usually spends his play time building things or playing outside in the yard. The neighborhood kids often put together all-ages soccer and whiffleball games, which I love. I will sit on the stoop and watch, sometimes I'll pitch or help the smaller kids.<BR/>All in all, I have noticed that some kids whose parents constantly play with them seem to have trouble being alone or finding ways to entertain themselves. I think it's great for parents to interact with their kids all day--talk to them, give them guidance on things to do, provide crafts supplies, make sure they are supervised, etc, but I really don't think it's my role to be the "playmate."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-36986610467979485782009-02-12T17:39:00.000-08:002009-02-12T17:39:00.000-08:00Nope, my mom did not "play" with me, although Gran...Nope, my mom did not "play" with me, although Grandma read to me and played dominoes and taught me to crochet, and Mom read to me, taught me to sew, and let me "help" in the kitchen. Dad taught me to ride a bike. None of my caregivers actually PLAYED, though. Playing was for kids to do with each other. My cousins' parents didn't play with them, and neither did my friends' parents. I did things with my kids when they were little but didn't "play" with them a lot.I don't think Kate is wrong for not "playing" with her kids more than she does.<BR/>I like that Jon doesn't mind being a SAHD. He seems to be a pretty good dad and the kids seem to love him very much.Nancyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006099582027100854noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-90104946026967180602009-02-12T13:01:00.000-08:002009-02-12T13:01:00.000-08:00Thank you for all your comments regarding my post....Thank you for all your comments regarding my post. I am not pertaining to being "Super Mom". But, now that J & K produce some shows you would think they would portray themselves more positively as in the earlier days of the show. I would cringe if I saw how I was being portrayed. This last episode just irked me. i'm sure Kate was tired, but to sit so far away and distance from Jon. They were just not that into each other that night and if I felt that way I would do the interview segment another time. Please check out the body language. You take away a stick from a 4-year-old you don't make a point of breaking it in half in anger... I'm not saying that J & K have a dysfunction family I stated that I came from a very dysfunctional family which has scarred my sister and I to this day. When you lived the childhood I had you can comment on that.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-67071145716816849562009-02-12T12:05:00.000-08:002009-02-12T12:05:00.000-08:00Too Funny,I truly enjoyed this last show and was s...Too Funny,<BR/><BR/>I truly enjoyed this last show and was surprised at how many of Kate's fan's did not like it.<BR/><BR/>We saw 4 year olds being 4 year olds. We saw the gamut of emotions, and each kid's unique personality. <BR/><BR/>We saw Jon doing a pretty good job parenting, (I thought)...I didn't see anything too rough, such as Alexis' cowering as has been mentioned by the conspiracists. ;)<BR/><BR/>I think Kate's fan's didn't like it because she wasn't in it and they missed that. There are alot of people who look up to Kate, look to her as a role model, so if Kate's isn't in the show it probably won't be too enjoyable for them. Opposite works for me tho, I like it when Kate isn't in the shows. Such is life.<BR/><BR/>But as they say, she is away working, and quite frankly I think it is a good arrangement for the kids and Jon...at least as good as it seems to gonna be.FIONAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03027241302948571151noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-85362602040079057242009-02-12T11:27:00.000-08:002009-02-12T11:27:00.000-08:00I love how if we don't see family or friends o...I love how if we don't see family or friends on the show people automatically ASSUME that the Gosselns don't associate with them or have any. I know for me personally, if a family member or friend had their own TV show I would NOT want to be on it. However, that does not mean that I wouldn't still visit them, go out with them when they aren't filming, etc. These complainers think that, just because these people aren't on the show for whatever reason, that they don't exist or that the Gosselins somehow don't have contact with them. That's foolish to think like that.<BR/><BR/>There are MANY other instances where people ASSUME thing just because something isn't often shown on the show like:<BR/><BR/>J&K don't tell their kids they love them<BR/>J&K don't play with them<BR/>J&K, or one or the other, don't spend time with the kids<BR/><BR/>......this list could go on forever!<BR/><BR/>We don't see them fart on TV either but I'm willing to bet that they do it. Good God! As I always say, for people who claim to not watch or like the show they sure as heck know so much about it. Rather I should say, they THINK they know a lot. More times than not they get stuff wrong.<BR/><BR/>And again, I love how the complaint before was, that neither J or K work. People said they needed to "get out there" and "work" and show the kids that both parents can't always be home with them because, in their opinion, both parents being home together "wasn't what happens in real world." So, now Kate has been off working like everyone wanted and expected her to do and all of a sudden people say she is a bad mom and gone too much? HUH? That just proves they just like to complain because, they got what they wanted and yet they still aren't happy. <BR/><BR/>They also b*tched that they wanted to see more shows of them at home doing normal every day stuff instead of jet setting off across the country. So, they do that and what happens? People complain the show was too boring. lol They can't win. I seriously think they didn't like the woods shows because Kate wasn't in it as much. And, regardless of what they say, I secretly think they LOVE when she is on the show and shown often.<BR/><BR/>And finally, as I also mentioned before, people complained before that the kids never got to run around and enjoy their yard. Well now that they have one that's more secure (i.e., fenced in) and they are doing just that, people are b*tching that they are left to run around on their own. PEOPLE, YOU CAN'T HAVE IT BOTH WAYS!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-86695238651771590622009-02-12T10:49:00.000-08:002009-02-12T10:49:00.000-08:00Oh and one more comment. Last Friday night I went ...<B>Oh and one more comment. Last Friday night I went to the movies with my 19 year old son and his friend and we had a great time. Laughing, joking. I teased them that how pitiful it is that I have a date w/2 19 year olds and they said that they are the pitiful ones out on Friday night w/ Mom. Each boy at the end of the evening gave me a hug and my son said he loved me. I told my boys every night when they went to bed I love them and every time I see them or talk to them on the phone we end the conversation w/ I love you mutually. I'm not sure I've see Jon or Kate say at bedtime or nap time they love them.</B><BR/><BR/>We don't see everything. I'm not sure if you're assuming that J&K don't tell their kids they love them or that they don't love them, but I think they act lovingly towards them and I also know that the cameras aren't on all the time. I don't think we usually see bedtime so we wouldn't know what their ritual is there.<BR/><BR/>There are a lot of virtues parents can teach their children. It just depends on your values. I, for instance, value modesty. YMMV.Guineverehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12594898905741204155noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-32206522059823207072009-02-12T10:46:00.000-08:002009-02-12T10:46:00.000-08:00No, my parents didn't play with me as a child, but...<B>No, my parents didn't play with me as a child, but my parents were also very dysfunctional which is why when I was raising my two boys my husband and I played with them alot.</B><BR/><BR/>I think if you read the initial blog entry as well as the comments that preceded yours, you'll find many examples of families where parents not playing with the kids did not equal "dsyfunctional household". I would venture to guess that the opposite is true, as well - I'm sure there are families where the parents play with the kids but are dsyfunctional in other ways.<BR/><BR/><B>Many a time I pushed a swing, played catch, played touch football, watched them ride bikes outside, read books, listened to music, played board games. I have many fond memories of in the winter time playing outside in the snow, building snow forts (it was Mom, boys agains Dad), hooking their sleds up to our big dog (who loved the snow) and throwing a tennis ball so the dog will chase it and watching my boys laugh with glee as they slid along in the snow. Swimming in the summertime in a small pool (yes, I was in the pool w/them and not sitting watching them), I even got my hair wet. My sons now are 25 and 19 and if you ask them they will make a joke how I was too much hands on and always in their lives.... Their Dad and I are divorced, but I still have a very strong relationship w/both my boys. I also worked f-t when doing these activities w/my boys.</B><BR/><BR/>You seem very, very proud of the job you did as a mother. Good for you.<BR/><BR/><B>You can find the time to not just sit in a chair and "watch" your kids play. You can get down and sit on the floor w/them, take walks w/them, take them to the park.</B><BR/><BR/>Kate has done those things on the show. She may very well do them off camera as well. As for watching v. participating, I just don't see it as a moral imperative. I stated in a previous comment, there are 8 kids - I don't think any of them are lacking for playmates. And again, there are plenty of examples that have been given of families where the parents did not play with the kids and the kids still grew up happy and healthy. <BR/><BR/>Sigh. I hate that this is becoming yet ANOTHER thing that women judge other women on. I realize that it stems from insecurity, that these women who boast loudly of what great mothers they are and how so-and-so is not a good mother because she doesn't do x are really just using their judgment as a way to make themselves feel better about their choices. But it's distressing nonetheless. Why can't we build ourselves up without tearing someone else down?<BR/><BR/><B>Kate needs to stop writing books and play and spend more time w/her kids. This is such a crucial age for them and she is missing out on alot.</B><BR/><BR/>With all due respect, you really have no idea about the truth of this statement. You don't know how much time she spends with the kids, and you don't know what she is or isn't missing out on. She is working, and like a lot of working mothers she cannot be with her kids 24/7. <BR/><BR/><B>Jon even said it that the babysitter is the one that plays w/them. No, Mom & Dad should sit down and play w/them. Play a board game w/them, Candy Land, Chutes & Ladders, anything.</B><BR/><BR/>Again, you don't know that they don't. Why is it not enough for you to be so very proud of the way you raised your kids - why must you also insist that other parents who don't do it exactly the way you did are wrong or bad parents?<BR/><BR/><B>Right now they are more interested in securing their money fortune instead of caring for the kids. The big house in PA, condo in Utah, fancy free trips, free appliances, free furniture...</B><BR/><BR/>They are interested in securing their kids' financial future. The "big house in PA" is for the kids. The condo is a rumor, the free appliances and furniture are just made-up/speculation unless you know something I don't. The "fancy free trips" have by and large included the kids. You are assigning the worst possible motivations for every action of J&K and in doing so revealing your bias.<BR/><BR/><B>Stop idolizing the supporting these two people. Pray for the children, they really need our thoughts and prayers.</B><BR/><BR/>I've not seen anyone who idolizes J&K. It is not as if the only two options are to either idolize J&K or despise them. It's possible for some people to have mixed feelings, or fall somewhere on the spectrum between "like" and "dislike".Guineverehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12594898905741204155noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-1355704484197691892009-02-12T10:35:00.000-08:002009-02-12T10:35:00.000-08:00Ohio Mom said...You can find the time to not just ...<B> Ohio Mom said...You can find the time to not just sit in a chair and "watch" your kids play. You can get down and sit on the floor w/them, take walks w/them, take them to the park. Kate needs to stop writing books and play and spend more time w/her kids. This is such a crucial age for them and she is missing out on alot. Jon even said it that the babysitter is the one that plays w/them. No, Mom & Dad should sit down and play w/them. Play a board game w/them, Candy Land, Chutes & Ladders, anything. Right now they are more interested in securing their money fortune instead of caring for the kids. The big house in PA, condo in Utah, fancy free trips, free appliances, free furniture... Stop idolizing the supporting these two people. Pray for the children, they really need our thoughts and prayers. </B><BR/><BR/>Ohio Mom, sounds like you have a great relationship with your kids and you should be justly proud.<BR/><BR/>I am going to say something I (and others) have said before: there is not just ONE correct way to parent. Each parent and child relationship is completely unique. Parents are just human beings so it is natural that we will bring our strengths and weaknesses to that role. Perhaps Kate isn't really good at the silly rolling-around-on-the-floor with the kids stuff. That's ok. She is not required to be perfect (as thankfully none of us are) in order to parent. Luckily, she has other strengths she can bring to her role as a mom. <BR/><BR/>Also, the book writing and appearances are part of <I> her job. </I> You indicated you worked full-time too so I think you can appreciate that working to support your children is also a pretty important responsibility and sometimes as much as we would like to be with our children, we have to be away from them in order to fulfill our responsibilities.Anya@IWhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10277215288731619588noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-326973141203981672009-02-12T09:54:00.000-08:002009-02-12T09:54:00.000-08:00My mom played with us all of the time. She could ...My mom played with us all of the time. She could color the best, fix my Barbie's hair just right and did a lot of fun things with us. <BR/><BR/>I enjoy doing things with my 3 and 10 year old. I have learned to play video games because that is my 10 year olds favorite thing to do. <BR/><BR/>My three year old loves crafts and we do two new ones each day.<BR/><BR/>I think Kate assumes that the tups can entertain each other and so she doesn't need to be as involved.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17817936060728058200noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-75950537172678845982009-02-12T07:16:00.000-08:002009-02-12T07:16:00.000-08:00Oh and one more comment. Last Friday night I went...Oh and one more comment. Last Friday night I went to the movies with my 19 year old son and his friend and we had a great time. Laughing, joking. I teased them that how pitiful it is that I have a date w/2 19 year olds and they said that they are the pitiful ones out on Friday night w/ Mom. Each boy at the end of the evening gave me a hug and my son said he loved me. I told my boys every night when they went to bed I love them and every time I see them or talk to them on the phone we end the conversation w/ I love you mutually. I'm not sure I've see Jon or Kate say at bedtime or nap time they love them.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-15940229455214823272009-02-12T07:11:00.000-08:002009-02-12T07:11:00.000-08:00No, my parents didn't play with me as a child,...No, my parents didn't play with me as a child, but my parents were also very dysfunctional which is why when I was raising my two boys my husband and I played with them alot. Many a time I pushed a swing, played catch, played touch football, watched them ride bikes outside, read books, listened to music, played board games. I have many fond memories of in the winter time playing outside in the snow, building snow forts (it was Mom, boys agains Dad), hooking their sleds up to our big dog (who loved the snow) and throwing a tennis ball so the dog will chase it and watching my boys laugh with glee as they slid along in the snow. Swimming in the summertime in a small pool (yes, I was in the pool w/them and not sitting watching them), I even got my hair wet. My sons now are 25 and 19 and if you ask them they will make a joke how I was too much hands on and always in their lives.... Their Dad and I are divorced, but I still have a very strong relationship w/both my boys. I also worked f-t when doing these activities w/my boys. You can find the time to not just sit in a chair and "watch" your kids play. You can get down and sit on the floor w/them, take walks w/them, take them to the park. Kate needs to stop writing books and play and spend more time w/her kids. This is such a crucial age for them and she is missing out on alot. Jon even said it that the babysitter is the one that plays w/them. No, Mom & Dad should sit down and play w/them. Play a board game w/them, Candy Land, Chutes & Ladders, anything. Right now they are more interested in securing their money fortune instead of caring for the kids. The big house in PA, condo in Utah, fancy free trips, free appliances, free furniture... Stop idolizing the supporting these two people. Pray for the children, they really need our thoughts and prayers.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-36151908839466842452009-02-11T19:02:00.000-08:002009-02-11T19:02:00.000-08:00I want them to learn to "fail" and fix it, move on...<B>I want them to learn to "fail" and fix it, move on and learn.</B><BR/><BR/>This was so hard to do at first! It's so critical, though. I am sometimes proudest when my kids don't succeed but handle it well, anyway. They feel confident knowing they don't have to be perfect, too.Annhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05884219068017641778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-14907892031340125842009-02-11T17:30:00.000-08:002009-02-11T17:30:00.000-08:00Glo and scarfoot:I couldn't agree more! I'm also a...Glo and scarfoot:<BR/>I couldn't agree more! I'm also a teacher of "tween", middle school and I see the same things:kids who don't know how to entertain themselves beyond video games, kids who feel entitled to have the world and adults around them entertain them; kids who expect everything, including learning dates and facts "fun" as if its a requirement. <BR/><BR/>I (hopefully) will be a mom soon (through adoption) and have been reading and thinking about what kind of parent I want to be. Yes, I want to be involved and play, but I also want to foster an independent, curious spirit in my kid(s) so they feel confident in exploring their world. <BR/><BR/>I don't want to do everything for them, solve all their problems, you know? I want them to learn to "fail" and fix it, move on and learn.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-30471267389315448522009-02-11T17:22:00.000-08:002009-02-11T17:22:00.000-08:00As a teacher, I see so many students who are under...<B>As a teacher, I see so many students who are under the misconception that the world owes them. They feel entitled to anything and everything they want because their parents have raised them that way. Mom and dad have always made the children's wants first priority, and they have always dropped everything to do for their children. This sets the kids up for a rude awakening when they go out into the world and find that they are not the center of the universe.</B><BR/><BR/>I couldn't agree with this more. I have issues weekly with parents arguing because their child turned in assignments a week late, and yet the parents want them to receive no consequences. I get tired of being the "bad guy" but that's how you learn responsibility.<BR/><BR/>I live very close to a university, and know many professors. I have been hearing many, many stories about parents calling the professors and demanding a grade change, insisting that the professor tell them information about their child's grade, etc. These are not even "children!" They are legal adults. <BR/><BR/>It truly worries me to see some of the things that are happening with children in this generation. However, there are some amazing parents out there, and some wonderful things happening as well. I just see some frightening trends.scarfoot79https://www.blogger.com/profile/01291250114236372321noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-129383513568171692009-02-11T14:20:00.000-08:002009-02-11T14:20:00.000-08:00I think that fact that this is an issue is most de...I think that fact that this is an issue is most definitely a sign of the times and not necessarily a good sign. No one would have made this an issue fifty, forty, or even twenty years ago. <BR/><BR/>We have become a more kid-centric society, and this has not necessarily been the best for our children. Yes, children should be a priority, but not at the expense of the parent, marriage, or family as a whole. One's life should not revolve around one's children to the exclusion of everything else. <BR/><BR/>As a teacher, I see so many students who are under the misconception that the world owes them. They feel entitled to anything and everything they want because their parents have raised them that way. Mom and dad have always made the children's wants first priority, and they have always dropped everything to do for their children. This sets the kids up for a rude awakening when they go out into the world and find that they are not the center of the universe. <BR/><BR/>Now, I am not saying that playing with one's children will result in a egocentric, entitled teenager. I play everyday with my 11-month-old baby, and we really enjoy it. IMO, the role of a good parent is not to entertain one's child, but to make sure that child is warm, fed, safe, and healthy. The rest is icing on the cake.Ginahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00618571038780185912noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-8095470295078168652009-02-11T11:29:00.000-08:002009-02-11T11:29:00.000-08:00Dr. H said...OT- I'd like a thread about disciplin...<B> Dr. H said...OT- I'd like a thread about discipline, because I need all the parenting advice I can get about that right now! </B><BR/><BR/>Great idea! We will do something on this soon...Anya@IWhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10277215288731619588noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-13700740026098895482009-02-11T10:42:00.000-08:002009-02-11T10:42:00.000-08:00My parents did not get down on the floor and play ...My parents did not get down on the floor and play with us. They certainly did things like play the piano with us, cook with us, read books etc. But they didn't play dolls, build with blocks, color, make art projects etc. And they certainly didn't play outside with us.<BR/><BR/>I do play with my kids. I am the kind of my that likes to get down on the floor and build towers, pretend we are a marching band, do art projects weekly if not daily etc. I also love to play in the sandbox, make snow angels, and go on nature walks.<BR/><BR/>That being said, I wish that there were more hours in the day and that I had more hands! As much as I do play with my kids, I always feel that I could do more! There are household chores that DO need to get done and done on a daily basis and I know that takes time away from playing with my kids.<BR/><BR/>From what they show us on the show, it does seem to me that Kate does not play with the kids. They have shown her "play" a few times but honestly I can only recall maybe 1 or 2 times (playdough outside and reading a book in the old garage). I am sure that she does play with them but they definetly don't show it much on the show.<BR/><BR/>I do hope that she does play with them! They are only little for so long!Bethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03530920615259170825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-31843140297661222392009-02-11T10:08:00.000-08:002009-02-11T10:08:00.000-08:00Well, I'll tell you ... I'm usually one of the fir...Well, I'll tell you ... I'm usually one of the first to pick on Kate ... but I won't on this one.<BR/><BR/>Yes, my Mom played with me. She did everything with me from board games to barbies to card games.<BR/><BR/>BUT ... and this is a big but ...<BR/><BR/>First off, she was a SAHM. Secondly, I was an only child and I was the only grandchild on one side of the family. There really weren't any other cousins or family to play with.<BR/><BR/>So, I would entertain myself ... but when I said I was lonely or asked her to play, she would stop everything and get out the cards or play Atari with me. It was a really good childhood.<BR/><BR/>Having said that, I don't judge Kate on this topic because she has SO many kids. There must be SO much more laundry ... SO much more cooking ... in comparison to our little family of three when I was growing up, her life is unimaginable to me.<BR/><BR/>Now yes ... you can argue that she doesn't work anymore and has help around the house ... but I'm just saying that in this case, I don't equate my childhood with theirs because it's apples and oranges.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-39976838053636650382009-02-11T09:39:00.000-08:002009-02-11T09:39:00.000-08:00My daughter is still young, only 18 months, but we...My daughter is still young, only 18 months, but we try to play with her a little every day. I read in the Happiest Toddler on the Block book (lol, I'm afraid of screwing up my kid) that sometimes when kids are doing stuff they know they aren't supposed to, taking 5-10 minutes and giving them attention by playing with them can re-direct them. It works okay for us. I like to play legos with her and to color sometimes. Oh, and she loves when I throw the ball and she gets to 'fetch' it, lol.<BR/><BR/>OT- I'd like a thread about discipline, because I need all the parenting advice I can get about that right now!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-41612318750666157192009-02-11T08:03:00.000-08:002009-02-11T08:03:00.000-08:00"Mommy, you don't play with us as much as daddy do...<B>"Mommy, you don't play with us as much as daddy does." She said she felt bad. But she also noted that she's the one doing daily care, and doctor/dentist visits (her ex doesn't want to have to take them to appointments during "his" time), and shuttle to daycare, and housecleaning, and scouring eBay for things they need... I can't believe she'd feel guilty for "not playing as much" when, clearly, she's doing what a parent is supposed to do--and what another parent is supposed to, too.</B><BR/><BR/>Amen. Too often, Dad is seen as the playmate, while Mom gets to do the grunt work. Too many times, it makes Dad seem like the "fun parent." Well, of course he is! He isn't there to handle the crappy part of the job! <BR/><BR/>While the "advocates" like to rip on Jon for "not having a job," I beg to differ. He's doing more for his kids by staying home and sharing the parenting duties with his wife than he would if he was still working as an IT specialist, gone for 12 hours a day. <BR/><BR/>My parents never "played" with me. And you know what? I'm not close to them now. At all. In contrast, my son and I are very close because I DID play with him, as well as coach his soccer teams, and be Little League mom in charge of fund raising candy sales, and coach the girl cheerleaders for his rocket football teams, and be a score keeper for his basketball games. And you know what? My uninvolved parents CRITISIZED me for it, saying I was "too involved." Well, you know what? My son is still around. I, on the other hand, couldn't get out of my parents house fast enough once I graduated from high school. Yes, it took me longer to get my college degree because I had to pay for everything myself, so I worked and went to school, but it was worth it in the long run. When my son came along, I swore I was not going to repeat my parent's mistakes and I didn't.MoreCowbellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01740518966343218314noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-84680867511574224242009-02-11T06:53:00.000-08:002009-02-11T06:53:00.000-08:00i tend to be the parent who does crafts and projec...i tend to be the parent who does crafts and projects with the kids and my husband is the one who plays outside, builds forts, etc. the nice thing about having four kids who are close together is that they entertain each other. OP mentioned how over scheduled and busy kids are today. we decided that we're not doing extracurricular activities yet for that reason. my kids come home from school each day and have lots of down time. but you can't believe the pressure i get from other moms that none of my kids are in sports. it's ridiculous. worry about your own kids, LOL! when i was a kid i don't ever remember my parents playing with me but i do remember that my grandma always did! i would go to her house and she would play with me the whole time i was there. i loved it. we also used to play the grown up game. i loved that grandma talked to me like an adult instead of a little girl :)<BR/><BR/>as far as kate is concerned, i can't really say if she plays with her kids enough since i only see a portion of her life. i also know that when they are filming they most likely have an agenda for her to follow.themrshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05036877130096142872noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-22472495603979538872009-02-11T06:37:00.000-08:002009-02-11T06:37:00.000-08:00Ack I have catching up to do! Bridget, congratula...Ack I have catching up to do! Bridget, congratulations!! It was indeed gorgeous here in Michigan yesterday. I took two walks with my nephew- one to the local post office and the other just around. At one point I put him down to stand on the driveway and his eyes got really big then he grinned at me and started just walking back and forth. He was not walking back in the fall, so he has never had so much space to just explore!!<BR/><BR/>I agree with the posters who mention how different childhood is now than it was before. When I was a kid my brothers and I would spend hours in our sandbox, or making forts in the garage with moving boxes (we moved a lot). Now kids have so many activities that there are times they are unable to just play and enjoy themselves. I think its really great how Jon and Kate mentioned their kids being involved in what they want to be involved in. Seems like otherwise there is just so much to do, and no time to just be.Lizzyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07466216446332311525noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-27733042062014384332009-02-11T06:31:00.001-08:002009-02-11T06:31:00.001-08:00Anya and Nina, Thanks for the congrats! No, I...Anya and Nina, <BR/> Thanks for the congrats! No, I haven't mentioned it, yet. I'm excited to have you all around to share this experience with. This blog is great :)<BR/><BR/>Last night, after I posted, my daughter and I went on a walk. It was an unusually nice night for February in Michigan. This topic made me think about spending more time playing and just being silly with my daughter. So, we just hung out and were goofy last night. It was fun :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-875099505545555742.post-12939141838279473802009-02-11T05:54:00.000-08:002009-02-11T05:54:00.000-08:00I've certainly played with my son, although it's n...I've certainly played with my son, although it's not an everyday event. Getting down on the ground with him when he was really little was probably when a new toy or activity was being introduced and I'd show him the "basics" of how to work things and then let him on his own from there to develop his own imagination and skills.<BR/><BR/>We read together constantly before he could read himself and he's always been a willing "helper" with whatever activity mom and dad happened to be doing.<BR/><BR/>What I value most in my relationship with him has been our ability to be silly together. I think being able to joke with your parents and see them being silly has helped him develop a pretty good sense of humor and he's able to laugh at himself as well....a valuable asset with puberty approaching.marcihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13281734978135533903noreply@blogger.com