Friday, August 29, 2008

SOUND OFF - Parenting Sills


OK Kate's turn.

31 comments:

Linda said...

I do like how Kate has them eat meals together. I like how the kids seem to be good eaters and I do attribute that to Kate.

Nina Bell said...

I appreciate the way Kate tries to always celebrate the holidays with a little extra fun. My mom did that and I did that for my kids too.

Anonymous said...

I can't really post anything that I like in particular about Kate's parenting style, but I will say on the "One-on-one" days she seemed a LOT less uptight, anal, and seemed like a normal, loving mom without snapping a billion times. Giving her the benefit of the doubt (I'm not a Kate fan) I think she'd probably be a good mom if she would have had her kids one at a time.

With so many kids now it almost seems like she's more of the drill Sargent trying to keep order than a mom, so I liked when she did the one on ones. I'd like to see that more often (or at least hear about it happening).

Anonymous said...

I love how Kate tries to take the kids on outings. I tried to do that with my kids. We were always going on little field trips to the apple orchard, train museum, pumpkin patch, beach, etc. I'm big into taking pictures too so to see Kate always snapping a photo like I do makes me laugh.

nomoredrama said...

I think Kate can appreciate the individuality of her children and she clearly loves them. She wants the best for them and out of them.

anya said...

I actually have quite a few. Most of them come from the sextuplets third birthday carnival party episode as I happened to re-watch that one recently:

*Kate grasps that the sextuplets miss out on things that an individual child routinely gets (undivided attention, for example) and strives to give them individual attention and special things (an over-the-top birthday party,for example).

*She loves to kiss and cuddle with them. Some of the sweetest scenes are those where she is cuddling with one of the sextuplets in one of the big living room recliners. (Yes, I acknowledge we see this more with the girls, such as Lexie or Hannah, but I think part of that has to do with the fact that those girls can stay still for a few moments and like to cuddle with her).

*At her best, she uses positive reinforcement effectively. ("Who sits nicely gets to be dressed first.")

*She asks them questions and engages them as individuals. One of my favorite examples comes from the third birthday party episode:

Kate: "What's today?"

Alexis: "A party!"

Kate: "For who?"

Alexis: "Um, God."

Kate: (smiling) "God? No, how 'bout you?"

Very sweet. I have more, but I'll let others chime in.

Anonymous said...

Kate tries to make sure that what the twins did, the sextuplets do at the same age. I think she desires a strong family unit. For better or worse, Kate desires a safe future for her children - nutritionally, financially, and spiritually.

Anonymous said...

I guess I would not have supported a Jennifer Aniston hate blog because I am not sure that she was cheated on. Was she? The marriage ended, but I wasn't there.

Susan Smith, Andrea Yates? Are we talking about the same show? Is someone accusing Kate of murdering her children?

Anonymous said...

Sorry, I posted the Jennifer Aniston comment on the wrong thread. I appreciate that you posted it, however!

Best thing of Kate, she tries to make a special time of the family time together. I think she has good intentions.

nomoredrama said...

Anon, you accidentally posted this in the wrong spot. I'll have to ask Nina how to move it back to the other thread.

I don't think anyone knows for sure if Jennifer Aniston was cheated on but I can tell she felt "some type of way" about hubby going to make babies with Angie.

As for the Susan Smith and Andrea Yates comments, they can be found in the latest show commentary on my "favorite" website. I could post them but I'd rather not. I only will if you don't believe me, LOL.

Daisy said...

One thing I appreciate about Kate's parenting is that she's consistent. Her children go to time out without being told twice and they stay there until told they can get up. That only comes with consistency.

She is big on family traditions. I think kids thrive on traditions. We have several traditions in my family and we are very close. Our kids look forward to each of them each year.

She teaches her kids responsibility by giving them chores.

She teaches them good morals, as in sending Joel to time out for lying.

She knows her kids and loves them individually. She's affectionate.

Guinevere said...

I was rewatching the visit to Hersheyworld episode tonight, and I found myself surprised (not for the first time) how very patient Kate is with her kids, far more than I think she's often perceived as being. There is a scene where Mady has woken up from a nap and is being really grumpy and whiny, and Kate gently, calmly and firmly manages to put her in a better mood. I was really impressed.

I understand how Kate's spaz attacks might stand out more vividly in peoples' minds, but really, I've seen Kate be like this with all her kids, many times. It makes it easier for me to say that Kate is a good mother without all of the "well, I know she's not perfect, but..." qualifiers. Because I think a lot of mothers - generally good mothers - would not always be that patient with a cranky child.

Tyra said...

She doesn't do 'baby talk' with her kids, she speaks to them with normal language and tone. I appreciate that she offers fairly 'grown up' explanations to Mady and Cara. She really seems to want them to understand the 'why' of life.

dotsicle said...

I like that Kate keeps the kids dressed nicely (even if just for the show) and clean (she's too anal about it, but I would hate to see them with runny noses and dirty faces). She doesn't use much baby talk (just things like "shrimpies", crabbies", and "dressies") and expects the twins to be helpful, as they should be. I do like that she calls on Jon to help her with the tantrums she doesn't have patience with. Rather than deal inappropriately, she gets Jon's help.

Linda said...

I liked the 3 year old birthday episode when Kate insisted that each of the kids were sung HAPPY BIRTHDAY individually.

anya said...

Daisy said...
"One thing I appreciate about Kate's parenting is that she's consistent. Her children go to time out without being told twice and they stay there until told they can get up. That only comes with consistency."


Can I just say this is probably #1 on my list too. It just impresses the heck out of me the way all six of them trot over to the time-out step promptly when told. Compare that to the antics we see on shows such as "Supernanny" where the kids have to be physically dragged over there a number of times wailing the whole time.

I agree consistency is one of her strong points.

MOO (momofone) said...

She is organized - maybe a tad overorganized. But I wish my laundry room and kitchen were as neat as hers.

She posts the kids artwork in kitchen - fridge, back door, cabinets, etc.

She cuddles with the kids. It is evident all of the children love and care for her.

She rarely ever curses. I don't think I've ever seen/heard it, but I could be wrong. And, it is TV, so I'm sure she has, haven't we all? :-)

Regardless of all the bickering - she does love Jon.

chick said...

She makes sure the household runs efficiently and she is smart enough to have chosen a partner who has many of the qualities she seemingly (according to TV) lacks.

She loves her children. She makes sure they look nice at all times. She is uber-organized. She has managed to make sure they get to go on a number of "fieldtrips", despite the logistical challenges.

I wish I could praise her "hands on" parenting skills, but I can't. I don't see much consistency - not when it comes to discipline, affection, positive reinforcement, etc. I am fully aware that no parent is perfect, and that all parents make mistakes. I just honestly can't praise Kate for parenting skills I have not seen her exhibit.

axiom said...

Kate has admitted several times that she lacked many experiences growing up that Jon had (i believe it was in reference to travel)

because of this its important to her that all of her children get to have the experiences she feels she lacked.

It takes alot of time and energy to rally up a family of ten for outings but she does it so that her kids can enjoy these experiences and have something to look back on.

GLO said...

I find that I admire Kate's ability to keep a positive attitude about her family's situation. It doesn't appear that she resents the fact that she has eight children, nor does she seem to limit their experiences too much based upon that fact. (Yes, I realize she uses 8 kids as an excuse for not letting them get dirty, but I think she was that way with just the twins.)

anya said...

"because of this its important to her that all of her children get to have the experiences she feels she lacked."

Agree. I think it speaks well of her character and her honest desire to be the best mom she is capable of to try and give her children a better childhood than she had.

As parents, don't just about all of us desire to do this? Of course, many of us end up repeating some of the unhealthy patterns too. Perhaps that's where we see some of her less desirable traits.

I give Kate credit because I honestly believe she tries to give her kids wonderful experiences.

Anonymous said...

I like that Kate named her kids nice, normal names and didnt try to be cutesy. There is none of the nauseating naming like the Duggars did with all J names either. Kates own siblings all start with K I believe so she could have gone that way. I think it adds to their individuality that their names are all so different.

Anonymous said...

Id like to comment on their eating habits too. I am very impressed with all that they eat. I know a GWOPer claims that Kate starves them to the point that they only eat the healthy foods because they are soooo hungry but its obvious to anyone with eyes that is another ridiculous lie. Its nice that she also allows them the occassional treat such as monkey munch. I have looked at the Duggars recipes and the garbage Michelle has her daughters cook for the family is nauseating. Kates healthy meals are far superior.

Linda said...

I have to say that to see a group of 4 year olds eat like that is impressive.

Anonymous said...

Kate seems to be able to hear through the whining and that's something that's sometimes hard to do. Whining is just sometimes so annoying that we don't try to get to what they are saying, like Collin in the furniture store "change me" or Leah and "I need a drink of water".

GLO said...

This is somewhat off-topic, but since the Duggars were mentioned in a previous post...did anyone else see that the Duggars are expecting another baby in Janurary 2009? Wowzer!!

anya said...

"I like that Kate named her kids nice, normal names and didnt try to be cutesy. There is none of the nauseating naming like the Duggars did with all J names either. Kates own siblings all start with K I believe so she could have gone that way. I think it adds to their individuality that their names are all so different."

I agree. I was just talking to my sister about this and we agreed that we pretty much liked all the names. I also think the middle names complement the first names well - both the twins and the sextuplets. (Ok, I am embaressed to admit - I know all the middle names!)

I think your point is especially well taken with the sextuplets. Their names will help contribute to their obvious need to separate themselves as individuals.

Thank goodness for no Gabrielle, Gwen and Grace. Or Gage, Garrett or Gregory. Great names, I just think it would take away from their uniqueness.

Next step: less matched outfits for the sextuplets. Right now, it probably makes sense, but when they start school I think this will be another area that both J&K can help them find their own individualism.

anya said...

GLO said...
"This is somewhat off-topic, but since the Duggars were mentioned in a previous post...did anyone else see that the Duggars are expecting another baby in Janurary 2009? Wowzer!!"


Lordy be!!!

Anonymous said...

I like how she is firm with them when they misbehave and doesn't allow them to call the shots. Also, she lays out clear consequences for them if they do misbehave..."Time out until you're happy"; "Be kind or you're in your bed." Unlike some people, I don't see anything wrong with that.

Anonymous said...

As a type-A person who likes things a certain way, I can totally relate to how she does what she does. I love the fact that the family eats every meal together (except when the girls are at school). And the kids get homecooked & nutritious meals. Something that a majority of Americans don't do. So KUDOS for making mealtime equal familytime!

Nancy said...

Yes, I like that Kate is a firm disciplinarian. Unfortunately, she does have to "pick her battles" with so many kids to discipline, and sometimes doesn't act on things I personally would have, but I do think Kate is a mother who wants the best behavior from her kids whenever possible. At least she has Jon to help her out with them when they need it, especially Mady. Jon seems especially good with her.