Friday, January 9, 2009

TCW Talks to Kate Gosselin


Today's Christian Woman Talks To Kate Gosselin.

Thanks Theresa for the link.

48 comments:

SamanthaNC said...

I liked this article- I love that Kate admits to being type A, bossy, and controlling. For those that blog consantly about how "terrible" she is- you can take a break, she already knows LOL!

Nina Bell said...

There is a 7 page book excerpt at the end of the article from Multiple Blessings if you haven't already read it.

Leah said...

Wonderful article! Seeing things like GWOP's posts sometimes start to turn me against the Gosselins, but articles like this remind me of who the family really is.

"Jon is the peacemaker, the helper, the follower. And it shows how I'm the organized thinker who gets out-of-control in charge at times."

As I see it, this is one of the main reasons Kate receives so much flack. Strong women almost always are met with criticism, especially by other women. In many ways, the criticism of Kate has mirrored that of other "in charge" females. Take Hillary Clinton: she was constantly called a "bitch", seen as conniving, and critiqued for little things about her appearance. Sound familiar?

If Kate was more like Mama Duggar or Amy Roloff and "let" her husband take charge, she'd definitely be more well-liked. Because she runs the house while her husband "helps", women automatically act hostile to her and men almost fear her, and everyone places all the blame on her. Ever notice how most of the haters think the Gosselins are horribly exploiting their kids, but love Jon?

I'm glad J&K+8 displays a family with somewhat atypical gender roles, but am disgusted with the sexism it's met with.

Of course, it's only my speculation. I'd be interested to hear if anyone else agrees/disagrees.

Anya said...

Leah said...As I see it, this is one of the main reasons Kate receives so much flack. Strong women almost always are met with criticism, especially by other women. In many ways, the criticism of Kate has mirrored that of other "in charge" females. Take Hillary Clinton: she was constantly called a "bitch", seen as conniving, and critiqued for little things about her appearance. Sound familiar?

Girl, you are preaching to choir with me! It's not something I have really talked about on this blog, but one of the reasons I spent quite a few months last fall defending Kate was because the treatment she was receiving reminded me all too well of what I was witnessing Hillary go through. Of course, a lot of Hillary's criticism came from the likes of Chris Matthews (yuck) and other assorted left-leaning male journalists who seemed to take the whole thing quite personally. Kate's criticism comes much more from other females (to be fair, women make up the majority of the audience). In both cases, however, there is a (mostly) unspoken feeling in the air that that the little lady should just keep her mouth shut. I resent it.

And of course, on the all-important issue of personal appearance there are some things they just can't do right. Hillary: "Look at those cankles". Can't she wear anything other than pantsuits?" Kate: "Look at her hair and wonky eye. Who does she think she is wearing low-rise jeans!?"

Sorry for the slightly off-topic rant, but it feels good to get off my chest!

On a happier note, I look forward to defending Kate and Hillary in the future - wherever their careers take them! :-)

BEE said...

I just loved this article! Kate is very straightforward and I respect that!

In our house it is my job to keep and instill order in our home. I pretty much set the rules for the kids and my husband helps enforce them when he is home. Is he any less a man because he doesn't "make" the rules or because he follows my lead on kid issues? Absolutely not! He is the leader of our family and we all respect him. I believe the same is true in Jon and Kate's relationship.

I think that Kate and Jon are very different people and they really compliment each other. Jon is more laid back and Kate is more controlling. Put the two personalities together and you have a good balance.

Desben said...

I have always found Kate to be refreshing in every article I have read. She is open and honest about her controlling nature and aren't we all a work in progress anyway? I think her marriage is solid and her family is her priority. I appreciate her being transparent and revealing faults rather than pretending to be superwoman. Her shortcomings makes her relatable on so many levels and I don't know how I would deal raising that many children. Every person has an opportunity to grow and learn from weaknesses they may have. I think she is well aware of that fact and she's doing the best she can with her life like everyone else. Enjoyed this aricle.

Southern Gal said...

This is a good article and shows Kate in a kinder, gentler light. The questions were tough and her answers were straightforward. Kudos to her.
I am not a Kate fan but don't go along with much of the horrible things that are said about her.
I do feel for the kids growing up in their parent made circus. My heart goes out to them.

Nina Bell said...

I just got a chance to read this. I think it was one of the best interviews I have seen in the last several months with Kate.

Anya said...

Hey me again (no political talk, I promise!).

Samantha is right on. You guys can give your typing fingers a rest. Kate knows her faults. Not that unusual. Most mature, self-examining adults know those areas we need to work on. Um, why do I feel that excludes at least 3/4 of the Gosselin haters?!

Nina, I totally agree. Thanks again to Theresa for bringing it to our attention. BTW, love love your avatar.

Set your DVR's ladies - "The Duel" is next week. Andy finds out about Dwight and Angela.
***********************************
Dwight Schrute: When I was in the 6th grade I was a finalist in our school spelling bee. It was me against Raj Patel. I misspelled, in front of the entire school, the word "failure".

merryway said...

I liked this one and the 700 Club one where I finally heard Kate in detail outside of the show. I listened to last two parts of radio jocks interview with Kate and enjoyed her “oh really”.

Kate from the article: Sometimes I wonder why it doesn't bother me that the cameras capture everything we say and do.

I think she does it all for her family. I'm sure she had goals around it like when she says she wants people to see the real them. But, I think her drive is to provide security. She certainly seems grateful for everything in the excerpt from the book. Even though I've been to the Gosselin website, I'm still surprised at how much their religion is apart of their lives. It would have been nice if F8 has shown us the real deal. If you're gonna do it, do it right.

Anya, I used to have this clip of Dwight's confessional on my answering machine. It was too long so I had to take it off, but it was fun for awhile.

Dwight: (In confessional) No. Don't call me a hero. Do you know who the real heroes are? The guys who wake up every morning and go in their normal jobs and get a distress call from the commissioner and take off their glasses and change into capes and fly around fighting crime. Those are the real heroes

Linkin_Obsessed said...

i love how kate manages to be spiritual and religious without being too in your face.

i'm not christian, but the way she explains stuff about her religion (especially at the end of Multiple Blessings) is rather delightful to read and makes you go, hey, that makes sense across all religions.

that aside, her being so aware that she's type A and bossy really cracks me up. she's an strong, awesome example for women everywhere. she knows she has to be type-a to keep the household in check, and does it even know she receives flak for it.

Saint said...

Samantha,
I read your comment before I read the article, LOL! You said it perfectly.

Lizabeth said...

AAHHH!! Dwight Schrute quotes! That makes me happy :). I can't wait for the new episode, The Duel, where Andy finally finds out what Dwight and Angela are up to behind his back :).

Back on topic-- I think why I really like Kate is what some of you have mentioned-- she is just a regular human who admits her faults, is willing to change, and who really just wants to do the right thing for her kids.

Besides that, I really love how the actual newspapers and magazines have articles like this which are more positive. The negative, hateful pieces are in opinion articles or trashy tabloids. That says a lot to me-- granted it could be argued that the PR machine can't control radio shock jocks, but even on that interview they didn't have anything that horrid to say. Those guys looked like frat boy idiots who could never even get a date with someone like Kate.

Just interesting to me how the more real articles and interviews we see the better Jon and Kate look. Granted she says Um a lot on TV, but if thats the biggest thing people can complain about methinks they doth protest too much.

Saint said...

I loved this article. It's as if Kate addresses every controversial issue head on. And she essentially says, "GDNNOP, you're right! You figured me out!" OK, she doesn't actually say that, but I feel like I've read these questions and answers here before, raised and surmised by commenters here, especially about how the show can be "real" and edited.

nc resident said...

Maybe because I do not care for her much I saw this as a plug for a book published by Zondervan.

When many of you speak about taking the first step and Kate realizing her shortcomings I'm reminded of my smoking habit. I realized for years it could cause health problems, and then it became less socially accepted. That was my first step. Not until I took the most important second step and quit, did it matter. Kate needs to take the next step with her attitude. She shows no willingness to do so but instead makes excuses, and rationalizations for this obnoxious behavior she displays.

I was really shocked to see that people still send them money and that money goes for her spa treatments. Before I get jumped she states it was two months prior she discussed how to spend this with Jon. Since she discussed this with Jon I wonder how much control she really has, but thats another question. So it is safe to assume a person that was in the process of purchasing, or had already done so, an elaborate home still takes donations to fund her spa visits. Simply amazing to me. I have to ask again if they want so much privacy how these gifts keep appearing. I also checked one day several times off and on in response to merryways' comment on another thread and I was unable to find any TV personality like them that has a personal website. Many have a myspace page, thats all I could find.

Maybe I'm a goof but this article is another fluff piece, it's positive but just as meaningless as some of the negative pieces.

FIONA said...

So Kate admits to being controlling, bossy etc...that does not excuse her behavior just because she can readily admit it.

I read the chapter and it did not sound at all like Kate's "voice"...I am not saying it sounded more like Beth, but it seems pretty clear to me that Kate didn't do the writing.

The Bible quotes seemed like she and Beth were trying to fit a puzzle piece into a place that didn't fit...or rather make sure they could attempt to find a verse to go with a particular story.

I also don't see her constant praise of God's provisions. OK, I realize the TLC could be editing out their bedtime prayers, or Bible readings, but seriously this is the most unChristian family I have ever laid eyes on.

I think that God is in her heart, but I don't ever see a sense of peace in either her or Jon.

She certainly is not as bad as others paint her, but I don't think she is nearly as great as some claim she is is.

What's to admire?

Nina Bell said...

I don't admire Kate. I don't hate Kate. I understand Kate. I understand that she has flaws just like many, many, many of the people that blog in the Gosselin blogosphere exhibit on a daily basis.

nc resident said...

i wanted to add since Kates' father is a minister why not include a comment like: I have had a strong Christian influence from my youth as my father is a minister.

FIONA said...

Nina,

I don't hate Kate either...sometimes I even kindof like her. But understand, I guess that is a stretch for me...to me that is like condoning the bad behavior.

Nina Bell said...

I read a comment by BEE on Baby Mama's site. It was a comment left under the most recent post. It was well written, made a lot of sense and exposed some of the commenter's own weaknesses.

I said yes, I have had those moments myself. Not so much anymore, but I remember when my kids were young and those stressful moments.

I think Kate is really trying to work on that. Or it appears so. I know with editing it could go either way. But I prefer to give her the benefit of the doubt.

Saint said...

NC Resident,
Sometimes when I tell my mom a story, she'll interrupt and ask, "Why didn't you say such and such?" Ihe answer is, "I didn't think of it. But I did say, blah, blah, blah."

You asked why Kate didn't phrase an answer in a particular way to mention that her father is a minister. The answer is because she says what comes into her own mind, not someone else's.

Saint said...

Fiona,
I admire Kate for carrying, delivering, and raising septuplets to the age of four successfully. I haven't done that. Few have or ever will. It strikes me as something beyond a normal human mother's capability since septuplets are so unnatural. Since motherhood can be challenging with a single child, I admire Kate for raising septuplets.

That's my credit given for credit due.

Could Kate be doing a better job? She seems to think so. That doesn't mean she isn't doing an admirable job IMO.

Theresa said...

LinkinObsessed said..

that aside, her being so aware that she's type A and bossy really cracks me up. she's an strong, awesome example for women everywhere. she knows she has to be type-a to keep the household in check, and does it even know she receives flak for it.

That's what I like about her. She's a strong woman and has to be to bring up a large family like that amid criticism, which she doesn't let affect her. I also realize she has flaws just like all of us. She's real.

I admire, Fiona, that she sticks to her guns and is doing what she thinks is best for her family. She's a strong woman and I admire that.

Theresa said...

Right on Saint!!
You asked why Kate didn't phrase an answer in a particular way to mention that her father is a minister. The answer is because she says what comes into her own mind, not someone else's.

January 10, 2009 11:08 AM

FIONA said...

I am not so sure that she is a strong woman. She is agressive, abrasive and curt...but I don't think of her as strong.

Strong willed, but then stubborness is not always a good thing.

Theresa said...

Difference of opinion Fiona. I like her, I think she's a strong woman. You don't, and don't see her as strong. I respect that. I don't think Kate is abbrasive. But, like I said, difference of opinion.

nc resident said...

Am I the only one that sees Kates' discussion regarding her financing for her spas days as anything less than a misrepresentation of their present financial status? Is she asking us to believe without people sending her money she could not afford to go, cause that how it could be interpreted?

BEE said...

nc resident,

I have a different perception then you of what Kate meant by using the money sent to her for spa treatments. When I read the article I immediately thought of monetary gifts that were sent to her from family/friends for holidays and special ocassions.

To answer your question, no I do not think that Kate is implying that without the money she has "saved" that she would not be able to go to the spa.

I think that she finally feels comfortable with their financial situation to do something for herself.

I think that Kate is truly trying to be the best person she can be. Does she fall short, yes, just like the rest of us!

Also, families like the Roloffs and the Duggars also have their own websites...jus like the Gosselins.

Linda said...

Actually . . .

I'm a lot like Kate in that if someone gives ME birthday money I don't spend it on myself. I throw it into the "family pot."

Saint said...

"Am I the only one that sees Kates' discussion regarding her financing for her spas days as anything less than a misrepresentation of their present financial status

I reread the article with your question in mind, because I didn't remember sharing your perspective.
Kate said:

Over the years, if anybody sent me money just for me, I saved it.


So Kate has an account with money given to her from whomever for a particular purpose: Kate. She saved it. And a few months ago, she talked to Jon and told him how she was going to use it: the spa.

That is not dishonest. She doesn't say she can't go to the spa unless other people had funded it. She saying how she uses the "For Kate" fund.

SamanthaNC said...

So Kate admits to being controlling, bossy etc...that does not excuse her behavior just because she can readily admit it.

I dont think that Kate is trying to excuse her behavior- I don't believe that she thinks her "behavior" needs excusing to viewers. I think shes' saying that she's a person with flaws, just like the rest of us. Personally, I have a few myself- you know?

Anya said...

Merryway, I loved your Dwight confessional! LOL.


Linkin_Obsessed said...
i love how kate manages to be spiritual and religious without being too in your face.

i'm not christian, but the way she explains stuff about her religion (especially at the end of Multiple Blessings) is rather delightful to read and makes you go, hey, that makes sense across all religions.


This is a point I can very much relate to. There is a real sense of her beliefs giving her comfort and helping her to make it through the tough times.

Guinevere said...

I was really shocked to see that people still send them money and that money goes for her spa treatments. Before I get jumped she states it was two months prior she discussed how to spend this with Jon.

Maybe this is money relatives sent for her birthday or Christmas. She specified that the money was for her, so even if was from fans, they wanted her to spend it on herself. Weird? Yeah, a little. But so what?

So it is safe to assume a person that was in the process of purchasing, or had already done so, an elaborate home still takes donations to fund her spa visits.

Okay, the quote is, "Over the years, if anybody sent me money just for me, I saved it." So we don't know who sent her the money, or why, but we know that it was sent just for her. Meaning that the person who sent it wanted her to spend it on herself.

Did an aunt or a grandparent ever send you money for a birthday? Did you consider it a "donation", if so?

...but seriously this is the most unChristian family I have ever laid eyes on.

Wow. Really? The most unchristian family you have ever laid eyes on? In what way? Unchristian in the sense that they don't seem to believe in God? Because they do talk about their faith, some. I would think you'd have encountered in your life people who were other faiths or non-religious who would qualify on that count as "less Christian" than the Gosselins.

If you mean in terms of exemplifying Christian ideals, it still seems like a gross overstatement. Open up a newspaper and I guarantee in the first story your eyes land on, you'll probably find examples of less Christian behavior than Jon and Kate model.

I've said it before, but I really rarely see people claim that Kate is great or extraordinary or that she poops rainbows and unicorns. The argument, as I see it, in the Gosselin blogosphere is not, "Kate is a monster v. Kate is a paragon" it is "Kate is a monster v. Kate is a normal human being, with normal human flaws."

I like Kate; I wouldn't say I admire her (I would say that about very few people in the world). She has traits that I admire, but it's not like I look up to her or want to be just like her or anything like that.

Am I the only one that sees Kates' discussion regarding her financing for her spas days as anything less than a misrepresentation of their present financial status? Is she asking us to believe without people sending her money she could not afford to go, cause that how it could be interpreted?

It seems like an extreme interpretation to me, to say the least. The question was about time for herself. In the course of answering, she mentioned that the money she uses for these spa trips (so she can have that time for herself) is money that she has been saving, money that had been sent to her over the years and intended for her personal use. Now, she could have just included that part randomly - as Saint says, sometimes when you're asked a question you answer it a particular way because that is the way you thought to answer it. I think if anything, the fact that she answered it that way may indicate that she feels guilty spending money on herself, and so she feels that she has to stipulate that the money is not coming from her show earnings, nor is it taking anything away from the kids.

You know that if Kate had told the story without mentioning where the money came from, some people would be up in arms about her spending money "her children earned" on spa visits for herself.

SamanthaNC said...

...but seriously this is the most unChristian family I have ever laid eyes on.

Today's Christian woman interview excerpt:
"Truthfully, I wish they'd cover more of our faith. But it's their decision to edit the episodes as they see fit. They've followed us to church."

TLC/Figure 8 isn't going to show you much of the spiritual side. I am a Christian and I'm so glad my life isnt an open book for strangers to judge just how Christian they think I am.

Christianity isn't about being perfect and Kate has never claimed to be. Its funny that I'm constantly defending her- bc she is far from my favorite person- FAR. She drives me nuts with some of the things that she says/does. The gum, the cupcakes, the HELLO'S, the way she criticizes Jon during the interview segments, her accent when she says the word "laughing": shall I go on?

However, I also hate the way they are judged sooooo very harshly. Comments about their faith hit a nerve with me bc I know that I do not always display exemplary/perfect behavior. I'm human and I make mistakes- but I'm still a Christian, I still love God, I still seek to serve Him daily, to teach our daughter about Him. So I guess this time my defense of her is a selfish one, in a way I suppose I'm defending myself.

FIONA said...

I understand that my statement strikes a nerve, but I go with what I see...how she treats others, how she communicates with Jon, I don't see them as Christian role models.

Saint said...

Wow, SamanthaNC, your response about Christianity and Kate is perfect. I have nothing to add except, Amen!

SamanthaNC said...

I don't see them as Christian role models

I really dont think they want to be viewed as role models for their audience. That however, doesnt make them "unchristian". I can think of far better examples of that LOL. _______ in a minivan anyone?

Gumby1 said...

Hello! Happy belated New Year to everyone. My 15 year old Cocker Spaniel has been very ill. She's doing better, but, well, you know, we've discussed quality over quantity. It's hard, she's all we have (no kids)

Back on topic: Guin - pooping rainbows and unicorns? Seriously funny, first laugh I've had in a while.

I too agree this was the best interview I've ever read from Kate. Articulate and honest. I finished the article with answers, instead of "oh, another fluff piece"

Two things stood out to me. Paraphrasing - her office is at home so it's always there. I have worked from home for approx 12 years, and when people say that I'm sooo lucky, I say, thanks, but I never leave work,it's always there, nagging me.

My point it that it may contribute to Kate's stress.

Secondly, Kate says that Jon chooses her to be the leader and he the follower. Literally as I was reading this site, my husband yells up to me all ticked off how does he find the number to call the cable company because the TV went black. Uhhhhh, Geeze....PHONE BOOK ANYONE? BUELLER? BUELLER? I had to look it up for him. We get along really well, but it was a Jon-follower moment!

Lastly, someone mentioned a while back that the Christian angle was covered with the Duggars, which might be why J&K's faith is downplayed. It makes sense from a TV perspective to me. Balance, something for everyone kind of thing.

I'm stressed, not sure if I'm making sense, but I'm glad to be back for now!

P.S. GO STEELERS!

Guinevere said...

Aw, Gumby1, sorry to hear about your doggie. That's always so hard. And I love cocker spaniels.

At least the Steelers won!

Gumby1 said...

Guin,
Thanks for your kind words. The Steeler win today really lifted our spirits. My nerves couldn't take a nail-biter, it's been a while since we've had a huge game like that.

Good night and thanks again.

Theresa said...

Gumby-Sorry about your dog. And, I too am a huge Steeler fan. Go Steelers!! Hines Ward is all psyched to dance in the stands. I feel another Steeler win. Sorry Ravens.

Back to topic... It seems to me it wasn't even a consideration with J&K+8 concerning showing their religious beliefs. It seems more like the producers were told to focus on the kids, any fights, any love, etc more so than their beliefs. I would hope Kate let's the producers show some of their prayers. I think it could only be another nice layer of the show that viewers identify with.

Go Steelers!

Theresa said...

Oops! I meant to say, I hope the producers/TLC take into any consideration of Kate's requests to show their dinner prayers and more of their religious beliefs in general.

As, with people, I think producing a show takes on its own life and should progress. This would be a good time to introduce that as they kids are getting older and it is a part of their life. Since Kate would like more of it shown, it wouldn't be so intrusive.

nc resident said...

too felt like stubbornly stomping my feet and yelling out to God, "I said one or two babies, not six!"

In another thead I discussed a newspaper article that quoted Kates' mom as saying she get her twins and more. This quote from her book is added just to show the mom meant, at that time (sextuplets birth), just so she doesn't appear to be misquoted.

nc resident said...

I want to add that while I do not think they are the most un-christian I have some concerns with what Kate says. If you read this chapter Kate seems to relate alot of her faith to what she is given, materialistically). "Look what Jesus gave us" if that theme continues people might read that and express some concern over whether they have a daily walk with God or whether it is just a hand servant to meet her needs.

Gumby1 said...

NC Resident,

I see your point. My view is that Kate tries to justify why her life is what it is. But her brutal honesty is just that, a bit too brutal. I don't think she does it on purpose.

Yes, there is a lot of materialistic reasoning.

She talks about how God helped her accept the sextups,and how much she loves the kids, but to agree with you again - mentioning the small house, Jons job, paying bills, it can be perceived that it's justification for the controversy/damage control.

After the introvert/extrovert topic a while back, it made me feel that she is definately an introvert. Her view on life and actions now make sense after reading the definition of both labels.

"sometimes I wonder why I forget the cameras are there" is evidence for me that she just doesn't concern herself with her environment. I harken back to my comment she made during the Toys R Us eppy - "I don't notice other people" (when Jon said she embarrassed him)

I find her behavior at times appalling, but I think I get it.

nc resident said...

I have 3 Goldens BTW Gumby so good luck with your Cocker.

Anya said...

Gumby1 - I know we have a lot of pet lovers on this site. We all wish your little one the best.

I laughed at your description of your husband wanting you to find the cable company number. I think we all have those moments on both sides of the equation.

Gumby1 said...

Thanks! "Lady" is holding her own so far. If I ever get around to creating a Google account, I'll make her my Avatar. She's all black, and just 17 pounds, the runt of the litter!