I really do not know what to think. There is speculation that her previous injuries from working at a mental health hospital caused depression which deepened her desire to have a large family. At the same time, does that excuse the way it worked out?
I have to give her credit for standing up for herself and being determined. She also called it a "gamble" as Kate has mentioned the fertility treatments being, just meaning that you never know what will happen (if anything) so even with the most extreme caution multiples are possible. I was just checking out the In vitro page on wikipedia and it states "The number to be transferred depends on the number available, the age of the woman and other health and diagnostic factors. In countries such as the UK, Australia and New Zealand, a maximum of two embryos are transferred except in unusual circumstances. In the UK and according to HFEA regulations, a woman over 40 may have up to three embryos transferred, whereas in the USA, younger women may have many embryos transferred based on individual fertility diagnosis." Even knowing that the fact that her doctor implanted 6 strikes me as bizarre...
I'm going to have to watch the full interview to get a better feel for this woman. She certainly comes across as intelligent enough, but her behavior, and even demeanor, belies some possible emotional/mental issues.
She's still at the stage where the kids are in the hospital, so she's not in the throes of having to care for the smaller kids yet. I don't think the full weight of that physical and financial responsibility has hit her yet.
It's hard to say how Kate Gosselin would have come across in an interview at this stage after her kids were born, since she didn't give one at that point, but I don't believe she would have come across as quite so *contented* as this woman does.
I don't know if the octuplet mom really believes things will just work out or if she's just delusional...that somehow she'll be able to be a "present" parent and work to support all these children at the same time.
I am kind of with you, Lizabeth. I have yet to form a clear-cut opinion on the whole thing. I lean towards believing that this had more to do with fulfilling some sort of destiny for herself than a pure money-making scheme.
So far, she has come off better than I expected. I don't know what I was expecting, but at in the brief glimpse we saw she appears a determined and poised young woman.
My initial impression -- she is a somewhat "unusual" person in very unusual circumstances. Beyond that, I am not sure what to think without more information.
I have to agree with everyone--it is hard to know what to think in this situation. I have been trying to give this woman the benefit of the doubt. That being said, the fact that she has chosen to go through multiple pregnancies without being financially secure is, IMO, not in the best interest of the children.
Also, if she is planning to go back to the school in the fall, how is she planning to be "present" for her children? Grad school is no walk in the park.
I think she has totally underestimated the amount of time, money, and commitment raising these children is going to take. It will be interesting to see how she is coping once the babies come home and the bills start coming in.
I still hope that those companies who have set a precedent of giving formula, diapers, etc. to families with HOM will step up for this family as well, despite the public backlash this woman is facing. It is not the fault of those children that their mother made the decisions she has made. They should not have to suffer.
I just dont know. I finished working at 6 last night and then it was a major rush to make dinner, feed my child, shower her, dry her hair, and spend even a little while with her before her 8:00 bedtime and I only have ONE child. I can't imagine life with 14 and I think she is looking at it with rose colored glasses- thats not to say that she shouldnt be optimisitc and do her best to parent them and provide for them, but she doesnt seem very realisitic in her view of the whole thing. Granted I havent seen the whole interview so maybe I'm drawing a conclusion too quickly? Anyway, I wish her the best.
It's going to be a loooong road ahead. I just can't imagine how logically you sign up for master's courses, load up 14 kids in the car, individually carrying at least 8 of them, drive to school to drop off at the daycare.
That seems like getting ready and out the door and to school would take an entire day. I remember many a time I would be ready to go and have to stop with two little ones because someone needed something.
I always joked with my dad that if I were alone, I could run out the door, to the store and get back home, passing myself and my two kids still trying to get out the door.
I don't want to judge Nadya Suleman just because her choices are not choices I would make. And I know she lives with her parents so I'm sure there's lots of help there, plus she'll have full-time nurse care I hear (it's provided free for one year when multiples are born), so if she's got a lot of support I think she'll be fine. I also read that TLC has been talking to her about a show but they first need to see if the family is "TV friendly". I don't know, there's a lot of controversy surrounding her so maybe advertisers won't be interested. I'd be interested in seeing how she copes though. And based on the fans that Jon & Kate have, I'm sure she'd get a following of supporters in no time!
Well, Nina, I think multiples isthe reason a lot of people started watching, at least in my family and my friends saw that as the initial attraction. Now I think it might be the bickering they look for, I don't know. But I'd be interested in seeing how a single Mom copes with eight newborns in addition to six other children. And while that might be my nightmare, I'd like to see how someone feels it's their dream. I'm very new to posting like this so forgive me if I'm slow and don't know how to do things.
I started watching after I saw the family on Oprah last March. They showed a lot of clips of the kids and they were pretty adorable. I think that was my initial draw.
I am not sure if I would watch a TLC show with this new family. Time will tell. So far I have not watched the other multiple shows.
I am truly interested in seeing the full interview with this woman. I do wish her family the best even though it would never be my choice.
Oh, Nina Bell, I didn't even know there were other multiple shows. I think the Gosselin kids are adorable. My daughters are addicted to the show. I rarely watch it anymore though, just passing through I'll catch the kids doing something cute, or my daughters will call me into the room to watch something. Do you know anything about PennyMommy? What's that all about? I read recently something about phony posts or lies made up. I know it's something to do with the show but I don't know what. I had seen a video of Aunt Jodi and felt bad for her but I don't really follow that whole story either. My girls say they miss her from the show though.
She comes off as intelligent, but oh my GOD, she doesn't seem to have a clue what she's gotten herself into. For one thing, she claims she's going to be able to support 15 people once she gets her degree. SERIOUSLY? The child care costs alone would make that an impossibility. She's never going to be able to work until the kids are old enough that they no longer need babysitters. Perhaps if TLC does come through, TV can be her job, but that's the only way.
Yes, you're going to "be there" and you've given yourself to your children, but there are FOURTEEN of them, under the age of SEVEN. Honey, you are ONE person. I think she's a bit delusional. Plus, it's not single parenthood that most people are offended by. It's the fact that yeah, she's single, but she's lived off her parents, the state, student grants, and disability payments stemming from a back injury in a hospital she worked in. Other people are supporting her baby fever.
Plus, her claims of a dysfunctional upbringing are in dispute. People who have known her have said she was a cheerleader, had lots of friends and involved, loving parents growing up. And I'm sorry, but if I hear one more person blame "Only Child Syndrome" on this situation, I'm going to rip someone's head off. I am the third of four straight generations of only children. None of us ever wished for our own football team to make up for our "lonely" childhoods.
Here's another question. Did NBC pony up the two million she demanded for the interview?
Once again, I don't know what to think about it. The babies are here. They need to be supported and cared for, and if no one gives in to her dollar demands, the taxpayers will foot the bill, so which is better in the long run? Might as well pay her and hope she's wise with it.
More Cowbell: Totally agree with you. Here is this woman who complains about her "lonely childhood" and her "dysfunctional" childhood. Yet, she is living with the parents who provided her with that "lonely and dysfunctional" childhood and who she obviously plans on using as her child care. Can you imagine trying to go back to school for your Masters degree in the fall of the year you gave birth to 8 and already had 6 with no husband just this "dysfunctional" family as support. When would you ever have time to study? None of this makes any sense.
I just saw the clip of the interview from the Today show this morning, and while she seems composed now, I think she's going to feel overwhelmed once all the babies come home. Granted, she'll have help, but there is also the six other kids, too. I hope she can handle all that.
There are so many questions concerning this lady. Something that makes me see a red flag, is the fact of her dealing with depression or having dealt with depression in the past. I think depression is an ongoing process for those who suffer from it to get well enough to be in a healthy mental state on a daily basis. I wonder if her bout with depression was considered by the doctors before she was implanted with the babies? If not, I think that's both irresponsible on her part and on the doctors who implanted. Those children need a stable, healthy home with stable healthy, loving parents.
I also question the knowledge of having the six already and being a single mom, then getting the procedure having 8 more join the house. I know quite a few single mothers and even though they have only 2 or 3 kids, they find it hard enough to get through each day and these moms hold down good jobs. I also realize everyone is different. Maybe Nadya can indeed be a true supermom. I personally will think she's going to be very overwhelmed. I think she needed to do a reality check before becoming pregnant.
Nadya will have fourteen and while she may have help now, she's going to be bogged down so much with the needs of her babies and other kids, how is she going to be able to complete her Masters, let alone give each of these kids the attention they deserve? She says she'll be able to provide because she'll have a good job. I hope she has something lined up already because people are losing their jobs left and right, and this woman expects to get in the workforce with her fourteen kids? God bless her for her gumption and I hope she proves me wrong. I also hope the father is active in the kids' daily lives. She and the kids will need that.
One last thing that I see as a big red flag is she always wanted children because of what she lacked in her childhood.
That was always a dream of mine, to have a large family, a huge family, and I just longed for certain connections and attachments with another person that I really lacked, I believe, growing up,” she replied.
Is this a responsible reason for a woman to keep bringing children into the world (without a partner), especially when you are of the belief you are going to do it as a single mother? (Before anybody thinks it, no, I'm not knocking single moms. I have a deep and true respect for single moms) But, I think if you want a huge family, and you already have six, then, you need to be mature enough to have your future planned out a bit more and make sure the enviornment for the large brood is healthy one and you are able to take care of the needs for each child. And, the kids deserve to have a stable father figure in their lives. Personally, I believe you bring children into this world because you know you can provide the love and care to raise them to be productive, healthy individuals who follow God's word in their daily life. Granted, there are a lot of accidental pregnancies and those kids are well cared for and loved, but Nadya seems like she had a plan all along. She knew she was going to bring into the world at least six more and do it knowing she'd be a single mom.
My prayers are with Nadya's children. I hope they are provided for and will live in a healthy and loved environment.
Well, somehow this single mother has managed to take care of 6 kids and go to school. THAT is a feat. So I guess we'll just have to see how she can handle 14.
Up until this point it wasn't her I was judging, it was the doctor who performed the IVF. But I believe she said that each of the other times, she had six embyros implanted and never ended up with more than twins. So I guess they just didn't expect that she would get pregnant with octuplets. But just as everyone has already mentioned, I will wait until more of the story comes out before I form an opinion.
I do hope that her family, friends and church will help her. It's sad how she's been so harshly criticized before anyone knew any real information. I mean, its fine to get into a discussion about the morality and ethics of IVF but to offer death threats to someone you don't know or know very little about? That's scary.
This all sounds like the jokey subplot of a doctor drama on tv. Woman comes in to a clinic already pregnant with eight, trailing her six young children behind her. Cue looks of incredulity on the faces of the staff.
It almost seems inevitable that something like this would happen. If you have enough money you can have almost anything done. Just now in the news is the 60 year old giving birth to twins and the woman with double k, or whatever, breast implants.
If this had happened on her first try people might have been more sympathetic. But after spending who knows how many thousands of dollars on the six she already had and still going back for more, I don't think people will be as eager to help her. Of course, nobody would want to see the kids suffer so I'm sure they will be taken care of one way or another.
Is this a responsible reason for a woman to keep bringing children into the world (without a partner), especially when you are of the belief you are going to do it as a single mother?
I don't honestly think it's ever very responsible to plan a child in the hopes of filling something that's missing in your life. Sure, that's a component of most peoples' choice to have children, but the main reason should be what you can do for the child, not what the child can do for you.
I haven't been able to watch the video, as I'm at work, so I don't know...it sounds like she comes off saner than you would think she is, based on her actions. I do think she's delusional; maybe she doesn't have a medical diagnosis but her actions are not that of a mentally healthy person. The needs of all 14 of her children are going to be enormous - I'm not sure how she's managed with the six she has already. Even if the financial aspect works out somehow, there is so much more that goes in to raising even one child. She is going to need a LOT of help. I hope she gets it; there is no reason to punish those children for her actions.
Did she say if she planned to have more? Because I totally wouldn't put it past her.
I'm sorry, and some people may think this is harsh of me to say, but she seems like a very selfish person to use children to fill a void in her life. After the first and second child that should have done a lot to fill her time and her voids. Why wouldn't she wait until she was more financially stable to fill that void? If she was thinking of the children she would have. I don't buy it not for one minute.
Kinley, you said "...she seems like a very selfish person to use children to fill a void in her life." I can see your point and had not thought of that before. Maybe that is the problem with a lot of people in the world having kids though and living vicariously through their childs experiences. Whether its forcing your daughter to take piano lessons because you never did, or making your son play football when he doesn't want to, I can see how a lot of parents do this to some extent. With the octuplets mom it seems intensified and more manic-- from what I can see, it is not a normal response at all... I appreciate your honesty, Kinley-- it made me think more critically about this!
To expand on what Kikibee said: http://news.aol.com/health/article/60-year-old-has-twins/332256
IMO, for someone this old (or even older, like the 72-year-old grandmother who got treated to have more of her own kids) to get deliberately pregnant is selfish. Chances are fairly good that you're not going to be around before the kids become legal adults--why put an innocent life through that? The ONLY reason: To fill a void in your own life, no matter what the cost to your offspring.
It reminds me of when I lived in Florida and wrote a newspaper story about pet adoptions. One of the shelters told me how it was quite common for elderly "snowbirds" (people who temporarily move to a warm state during the winter months) to go adopt a cat at the beginning of the season, and then bring the cat back to the shelter in the spring so that the person could go back up north animal-free. Then repeat the cycle next winter, with a different hapless kitty. Totally selfish, and a little cruel.
As for the Octo-Mom: She did come across as intelligent and articulate. But in this case, it's not her demeanor but what she actually says that seems to indicate some kind of mental problem (having kids to fill the void of being an only child being one example.)
I also agree with what Kinley said. I know I may be judging her harshly, but, yes. I get delusional and selfish vibes from her.
Right now, she thinks she's got it in the bag. I wonder if TLC's cameras will be around when she's got all 14 at home and all eight babies are squalling to be fed and the two year old's diaper needs to be changed. I'm willing to bet her calm, cool, "Screw all you people. I got this" demeanor changes.
I kind of feel sorry for the Octo-Mom. My twins keep me really busy and I have family help. The Octo-Mom is going to need lots of help once ALL the babies come home.
It is a miracle that all the babies are healthy and doing good.
I just saw on the news that as a result of what Octuplet Mom said in her interview today about having six embryos implanted EACH time she got pregnant (and that this is the only time that one or two babies was not the result), the State of California is launching an investigation into what fertility clinic would participate in this practice.
This situation could lead to laws such as the one in Great Britain which limits the implantation of more than two embryos in each cycle.
I just cannot fathom how with a masters degree she thinks she will be able to support all those children. She said she wanted to be there always for her children, holding them and loving them - how is she realistically going to have much time to do that with all those children? And I am not sure that a daycare is the most hygienic, protective environment that eight premature babies need.
I respect her tenacity in defending herself, and am sure she does love all of her children. I wouldn't have selectively reduced, either. However, my overall thought as I watched this interview was that I wondered how much counseling the woman received before going through this process (asking, of course, since she is getting a masters in counseling).
I hate to judge her, too. It's hard not to, and like others here, I have a strong feeling of something being "not right" with this situation. I feel the most for all 14 children. They have a tough road ahead.
I think there exists a strong ethical issue here that will ultimately come down to women who choose fertility treatments be more carefully evaluated and even perhaps mandating how many fetus' a woman can safely carry. I also believe that you need to provide financial proof that you can pay for your own care and the care of all the babies in the NICU. I firmly feel that is not something that the government should be expected to cover.
Nine lives were at stake, and while we don't know how many embryos were implanted, at some point in time when does medical advice become legally mandated and reduction is forced?
The likelihood is the children will have medical issues and that cost, including her pregnancy is absorbed by tax payers.
Just because science CAN produce 6,7 or 8 babies, does not mean it should.
Did anyone else think she looked like Angelie Jolie? Why do I think she had plastic surgery?
Generally I am opposed to government getting involved in medical decisions. The countries that limit IVF transfers to 1 or 2 also have national health insurance. Wonen in US mostly pay for IVF themselves so there is financial pressure to get a bigger bang for the buck. That being said, the current medical practice is 1 or 2 with up to 4 after failed cycles. There is a high rate of twinning with IVF. Certain procedures such as assisted hatching can raise rate to 10%. It would be very bold to lie on national TV but I still wonder if she used black market fertility drugs and artificial insemination. I find it hard to believe that's doctor would transfer 6 each time! That doctor should lose their license. It is so odd that she just showed up at kaiser like that.
I think my cold medicine is making me think of these conspiracy theories.
I have nothing bad to say about this mom. More info needed. She is pretty, she speaks softly and with intelligence....I cannot say anything unkind about a mom seen for just a few minutes on TV. When she's been on TV as long as Kate, I'm sure we will all be more able to state an opinion.
She probably didn't adopt because she wouldn't qualify. The rules are really strict for adoption.
I try not to judge her. She is going to a very busy mom with all those kids though. I sure hope that once all the babies are home that she has plenty of help. I just can't imagine having to take care of eight infants.
I think there exists a strong ethical issue here that will ultimately come down to women who choose fertility treatments be more carefully evaluated and even perhaps mandating how many fetus' a woman can safely carry.
Hi Fiona, I agree that there should definitley be a limit on how many eggs can be implanted (I dont know what the limit is currently) but once the fetus is there it shouldnt be up to the doctor as to whether or not the mother can carry it. Personally, I couldnt bring myself to reduction. It would be a hard decision for anyone I imagine
"She probably didn't adopt because she wouldn't qualify. The rules are really strict for adoption."
The adoption screening process probably would have uncovered this woman's obsession with having babies to fulfill whatever she believes she didn't have in her less than ideal childhood. That would be a red flag in any psychological evaluation about the prospective parent's ability to focus on the needs of the children versus their own unresolved issues.
This woman had six children and still pursued a HOM pregnancy that endangered not only the lives of the unborn children, but her own life as well, with no regard for potentially leaving her 6 children without a mother if she hadn't survived the dangerous pregnancy. I think the fact that she had so little regard for her existing children that she would pursue this risky pregnancy when she was the only parent in their lives indicates more than poor judgment on her part.
The Associated Press has uncovered quite a bit of information about this woman that indicates the image she's attempting to create for herself in the media is just that, an image, not the reality. According to documents obtained by the AP from the CA Division of Worker's Compensation, she received a total of $165,000 in payments for an on the job back injury that she claimed left her in "near constant pain" and unable to work between 2002-2008. And yet during this same time, she had several pregnancies. How does someone who's unable to work due to near constant back pain carry one pregnancy after another, including one with HOMs?
Fortunately, the CA Medical Board is investigating the circumstances of this birth, and I hope there will be further investigations into this woman's ability to provide the necessary care and support for 8 newborns and 6 children under 7 years old.
AP article: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090207/ap_on_re_us/octuplets
I watched the online clips of the interview. I'm not sure what to think about her. She seemed to have her stuff together but how together can you be when facing raising 14 kids on your own? I'd be a basket case!
Sadly other people will be raising her children and paying for them as well. Someone has to watch the kids when she's in school and paying her bills when she's jobless. I think this mother is selfish of her lifelong dream to being a mother of a large abode and she's expecting her family, friends and her church to pay for everything. I feel sorry for her. I'm glad I don't live in California anymore because Cali tax payers are paying for her medical bills and all her 8 babies. Sorry California.
My first thought on seeing Nadya Suleman was that she had obvious plastic surgery on her nose and lips. Yes, I could see a slight resemblance to Angelina Jolie, but in a grotesque, Michael Jackson way (was the c-section done via her mouth? Because her lips looked like Kate Gosselin's jowls of a dog to me) and I would not be flattered if I were AJ. I do not share the opinion that she is attractive or that the "camera loves her" for her photogenic qualities. I think ANY camera loves her for the story she is telling with them honed in on her. More false love. Excessive plastic surgery is a disorder in itself (even though she denies having any). Piggy back that on top of her insatiable need to have children in order to feel fulfilled, and there is a recipe for disaster. Again, little lives created that are completely innocent due to the lack of common sense and foresight by a wannabe supermom and an unethical doctor.
Keep in mind that she is probably on pain medication after her c-section, so might appear a bit calmer, mellow. Many mentally ill people can be extremely articulate as well as manipulative. If she had truly felt that she would be able to provide for them with her schooling, family, friends and church support, then why not just keep the privacy settings on your life as high as possible and get on with the task of raising them. One does NOT do a major television interview and hire a publicist if they aren't fishing for millions in lucrative TV deals a la sponsorships, reality shows, first photos, etc.
Hopefully whatever investigation that is going to be carried out will result in her getting help for that empty, unable-to-be-filled hole within, and allow those children, all 14 of them, to grow up without the rampant intrusiveness of a television crew and media attention. We do not need another show about multiples or other unusual or large families. Once a year specials would satiate the curiosity factor that this situation creates without disrupting little lives by filming all aspects, all the time. And I'm not even certain THAT is OK anymore.
I feel sorry for this woman's parents. I don't know that they signed up for this. She acts like no one should question her choices. I saw a reporter talking to her mother, and she seemed less that thrilled. She already is taking care of the other six. Her parents appear to be the ones who are "present" for her children. Her interview was predominately about what "I" have always wanted. I think that says it all.
Indianprincess: I'm glad I don't live in California anymore because Cali tax payers are paying for her medical bills and all her 8babies. Sorry California.
We appreciate the sympathy, :-)
I had my taxes done early this year. I usually get a decent refund. This year it's $1,900 (which believe me I have spent 40 different ways). California has put a 30-day hold on all refunds, however, due to our cash shortage. I know it's my own fault. I should increase my deductions and not count on my little February windfall, but it's still aggravating considering it's my money.
Oh and many of our state workers are having to take two unpaid days a month to help with the budget crises. It's crazy.
So, I guess you can say from a selfish standpoint California taxpapers would appreciate a little help from whomever is interested in her story and wants to contribute.
Meaghan, you got your avatar. Looks great! I enjoyed your rant. I haven't made up my mind on all this yet, but I think you make some solid points.
Thank you, Anya. I like it too, as it reminds me of my grandfather (who called me Petunia, lol), and who would have kicked my behind into next year if I ever did something like this to his great grandchildren.
The Blogger issue seemed to be a firewall issue, and needed a reboot and some tinkering.
Meaghan, great points on the plastic surgery sickness and mentally ill patients being able to articulate well even though they have mental illness. It is manipulative.
Reality hasn't set in and right now her octuplets are being cared for by doctors and nurses. She truly has no idea what's going to hit her.
I don't see why people (and I'm not talking about you, I mean people in general) would automatically assume that she's equipped to handle a reality tv show either. Or, that she's going to automatically get one. I would even think TLC would want to stay away from this lady. They have to be thinking about these same issues of what we all are talking about. Just because a woman has multiples, she shouldn't be made a candidate for a reality tv show. Or, that she's mentally and physically equipped to handle one. I see a lot of issues with this woman. Most of all, her not being equipped to properly take care of her 14 kids, let alone having cameras around. Recipe for disaster indeed.
Once again, I truly feel sorry for these children.
I think she is delusional on multiple levels. It irks me that she sees people are only reacting negatively to her because she is a single mother. That is just one aspect of this crazy drama.
What disturbed me most is how she made comments about what should it matter how many she has... she loves them all and takes the time to love them. First, how will you have time for 14 kids under the age of 7 and eight of them being preemies along with graduate school coursework? Second, Ann Curry mentioned that she spends a minimum of 45 minutes a day holding each baby. That adds up to a minimum of 6 hours a day. How much of their mom are the other 6 getting??
I think the miracle in all of this is that she was able to make it to 30 weeks and almost all of the babies had relatively strong lungs. I really do hope that this family faces minimal health complications, as that would compromise the mother's time even more.
I don't see any problem with having a spokeperson or publicist. I'm sure she is getting tons if requests for interviews and such. She needs to focus her health and her children. Her parents haven't presented her in the best light so far. She would be smart not to trust them to evaluate requests. I guess I don't think that she is necessarily trying to get a reality show.
This situation is so unusual. I feel sorry for the women struggling with infertility and her being the public face of IVF.
Just because science CAN produce 6,7 or 8 babies, does not mean it should.
I agree, Fiona. I am uncomfortable with many things science does. "Forced reductions" makes me sick. I don't want the government dictating how many embryos should be legal to implant because I don't want to police and enforce medicine. But this is a case of malpractice to me. The doctor who did this has no sense! He put his patients' lives at risk. "First do no harm?"
Yet other women in different circumstances would require different standards than this woman because of factors such as age or the cause of the infertility. So how do we write the law about this?
It's really a tricky situation, and I only see these things getting trickier. I am on the fence about the legality of all this. Posters have brought up excellent points for consideration.
I am not on the fence about the care of these kids. I am not opposed to her seeking the two million dollars because she needs money. She needs it. I would rather see the family receive specific items like clothes, food, diapers, electricity, a home, a car, car seats, etc. than money.
I didn't know how bad things were financially in CA. I haven't been following closely.
Of course I have no idea, but her lips look unnatural and the resemblance to A. Jolie makes me suspicious, too.
By and large, fertility treatments are cash-only paying procedures. In the US there are no hard and fast rules only guidelines for fertility treatment, but the ethical standard is first "do no harm."
"Just because science CAN produce 6,7 or 8 babies, does not mean it should."
ITA. Human beings were never intended to reproduce in litters. Before fertility treatments became available, a HOM birth was extremely rare, with a low survival rate. There's a reason for that: the female body is designed to carry one baby to term in order to provide the optimal environment for long-term health and survival. The fertility specialists who have been interviewed about this woman have said that the goal of fertility treatment is always to obtain a pregnancy for one healthy baby, although there's an increased risk for twins or even triplets, which also increase the risks to the mother and babies.
This woman said: "They're my embryos, I wanted them all implanted," and therein lies the problem. An ethical fertility specialist would have refused. If a woman has no regard for the risks to her own life as well as the embryos, one would hope every fertility specialist would refuse to do more than is appropriate for that woman's situation, and every specialist interviewed to date has said they can't imagine a scenario where 8 would be appropriate. But someone, somewhere abandoned any ethical considerations and did it anyway, which proves that professional ethics alone will not prevent an unethical procedure.
First of all, I laughed out loud when this woman said that she "knows" she will be able to support her children when she gets her masters (In COUNSELING).
I have a Master's in Counseling. I work ridiculous hours a week to support myself and have about 3 different jobs that I do. I make a lot less then you would think. The mental health field is not a lucrative field (especially in the beginning, before you are licensed). Hence, why I am planning to apply for more grad school to get a doctorate
(Yep, Peri, I said it...wanna quote me?)
There is no way a Master's in Counseling is even going to remotely help her support these kids. Not fourteen as a single mother. Not even 4. She'll keep scheming and scamming to make money and someone will give it to her.
Meanwhile I think the fertility doctor should definitely be investigated.
54 comments:
I really do not know what to think. There is speculation that her previous injuries from working at a mental health hospital caused depression which deepened her desire to have a large family. At the same time, does that excuse the way it worked out?
I have to give her credit for standing up for herself and being determined. She also called it a "gamble" as Kate has mentioned the fertility treatments being, just meaning that you never know what will happen (if anything) so even with the most extreme caution multiples are possible. I was just checking out the In vitro page on wikipedia and it states "The number to be transferred depends on the number available, the age of the woman and other health and diagnostic factors. In countries such as the UK, Australia and New Zealand, a maximum of two embryos are transferred except in unusual circumstances. In the UK and according to HFEA regulations, a woman over 40 may have up to three embryos transferred, whereas in the USA, younger women may have many embryos transferred based on individual fertility diagnosis." Even knowing that the fact that her doctor implanted 6 strikes me as bizarre...
I'm going to have to watch the full interview to get a better feel for this woman. She certainly comes across as intelligent enough, but her behavior, and even demeanor, belies some possible emotional/mental issues.
She's still at the stage where the kids are in the hospital, so she's not in the throes of having to care for the smaller kids yet. I don't think the full weight of that physical and financial responsibility has hit her yet.
It's hard to say how Kate Gosselin would have come across in an interview at this stage after her kids were born, since she didn't give one at that point, but I don't believe she would have come across as quite so *contented* as this woman does.
I don't know if the octuplet mom really believes things will just work out or if she's just delusional...that somehow she'll be able to be a "present" parent and work to support all these children at the same time.
I am kind of with you, Lizabeth. I have yet to form a clear-cut opinion on the whole thing. I lean towards believing that this had more to do with fulfilling some sort of destiny for herself than a pure money-making scheme.
So far, she has come off better than I expected. I don't know what I was expecting, but at in the brief glimpse we saw she appears a determined and poised young woman.
My initial impression -- she is a somewhat "unusual" person in very unusual circumstances. Beyond that, I am not sure what to think without more information.
I have to agree with everyone--it is hard to know what to think in this situation. I have been trying to give this woman the benefit of the doubt. That being said, the fact that she has chosen to go through multiple pregnancies without being financially secure is, IMO, not in the best interest of the children.
Also, if she is planning to go back to the school in the fall, how is she planning to be "present" for her children? Grad school is no walk in the park.
I think she has totally underestimated the amount of time, money, and commitment raising these children is going to take. It will be interesting to see how she is coping once the babies come home and the bills start coming in.
I still hope that those companies who have set a precedent of giving formula, diapers, etc. to families with HOM will step up for this family as well, despite the public backlash this woman is facing. It is not the fault of those children that their mother made the decisions she has made. They should not have to suffer.
I just dont know. I finished working at 6 last night and then it was a major rush to make dinner, feed my child, shower her, dry her hair, and spend even a little while with her before her 8:00 bedtime and I only have ONE child. I can't imagine life with 14 and I think she is looking at it with rose colored glasses- thats not to say that she shouldnt be optimisitc and do her best to parent them and provide for them, but she doesnt seem very realisitic in her view of the whole thing. Granted I havent seen the whole interview so maybe I'm drawing a conclusion too quickly? Anyway, I wish her the best.
It's going to be a loooong road ahead. I just can't imagine how logically you sign up for master's courses, load up 14 kids in the car, individually carrying at least 8 of them, drive to school to drop off at the daycare.
That seems like getting ready and out the door and to school would take an entire day. I remember many a time I would be ready to go and have to stop with two little ones because someone needed something.
I always joked with my dad that if I were alone, I could run out the door, to the store and get back home, passing myself and my two kids still trying to get out the door.
I don't want to judge Nadya Suleman just because her choices are not choices I would make. And I know she lives with her parents so I'm sure there's lots of help there, plus she'll have full-time nurse care I hear (it's provided free for one year when multiples are born), so if she's got a lot of support I think she'll be fine.
I also read that TLC has been talking to her about a show but they first need to see if the family is "TV friendly". I don't know, there's a lot of controversy surrounding her so maybe advertisers won't be interested. I'd be interested in seeing how she copes though. And based on the fans that Jon & Kate have, I'm sure she'd get a following of supporters in no time!
Eileen,
Where do you stand on the whole Jon and Kate debate?
And based on the fans that Jon & Kate have, I'm sure she'd get a following of supporters in no time!
What are we basing this on. Just wondering. Volume of fans? Do you believe that the fans only watch Jon & Kate because they had multiples?
Well, Nina, I think multiples isthe reason a lot of people started watching, at least in my family and my friends saw that as the initial attraction. Now I think it might be the bickering they look for, I don't know.
But I'd be interested in seeing how a single Mom copes with eight newborns in addition to six other children. And while that might be my nightmare, I'd like to see how someone feels it's their dream.
I'm very new to posting like this so forgive me if I'm slow and don't know how to do things.
Thanks Eileen,
I started watching after I saw the family on Oprah last March. They showed a lot of clips of the kids and they were pretty adorable. I think that was my initial draw.
I am not sure if I would watch a TLC show with this new family. Time will tell. So far I have not watched the other multiple shows.
I am truly interested in seeing the full interview with this woman. I do wish her family the best even though it would never be my choice.
Oh, Nina Bell, I didn't even know there were other multiple shows.
I think the Gosselin kids are adorable. My daughters are addicted to the show.
I rarely watch it anymore though, just passing through I'll catch the kids doing something cute, or my daughters will call me into the room to watch something.
Do you know anything about PennyMommy? What's that all about? I read recently something about phony posts or lies made up. I know it's something to do with the show but I don't know what.
I had seen a video of Aunt Jodi and felt bad for her but I don't really follow that whole story either. My girls say they miss her from the show though.
Yes I know all about Penn Mommy. If you want to email me at ninabell53@gmail.com, I can email some links back to you so you can read up on it.
She comes off as intelligent, but oh my GOD, she doesn't seem to have a clue what she's gotten herself into. For one thing, she claims she's going to be able to support 15 people once she gets her degree. SERIOUSLY? The child care costs alone would make that an impossibility. She's never going to be able to work until the kids are old enough that they no longer need babysitters. Perhaps if TLC does come through, TV can be her job, but that's the only way.
Yes, you're going to "be there" and you've given yourself to your children, but there are FOURTEEN of them, under the age of SEVEN. Honey, you are ONE person. I think she's a bit delusional. Plus, it's not single parenthood that most people are offended by. It's the fact that yeah, she's single, but she's lived off her parents, the state, student grants, and disability payments stemming from a back injury in a hospital she worked in. Other people are supporting her baby fever.
Plus, her claims of a dysfunctional upbringing are in dispute. People who have known her have said she was a cheerleader, had lots of friends and involved, loving parents growing up. And I'm sorry, but if I hear one more person blame "Only Child Syndrome" on this situation, I'm going to rip someone's head off. I am the third of four straight generations of only children. None of us ever wished for our own football team to make up for our "lonely" childhoods.
Here's another question. Did NBC pony up the two million she demanded for the interview?
Once again, I don't know what to think about it. The babies are here. They need to be supported and cared for, and if no one gives in to her dollar demands, the taxpayers will foot the bill, so which is better in the long run? Might as well pay her and hope she's wise with it.
More Cowbell:
Totally agree with you. Here is this woman who complains about her "lonely childhood" and her "dysfunctional" childhood. Yet, she is living with the parents who provided her with that "lonely and dysfunctional" childhood and who she obviously plans on using as her child care. Can you imagine trying to go back to school for your Masters degree in the fall of the year you gave birth to 8 and already had 6 with no husband just this "dysfunctional" family as support. When would you ever have time to study? None of this makes any sense.
I just saw the clip of the interview from the Today show this morning, and while she seems composed now, I think she's going to feel overwhelmed once all the babies come home. Granted, she'll have help, but there is also the six other kids, too. I hope she can handle all that.
There are so many questions concerning this lady. Something that makes me see a red flag, is the fact of her dealing with depression or having dealt with depression in the past. I think depression is an ongoing process for those who suffer from it to get well enough to be in a healthy mental state on a daily basis. I wonder if her bout with depression was considered by the doctors before she was implanted with the babies? If not, I think that's both irresponsible on her part and on the doctors who implanted. Those children need a stable, healthy home with stable healthy, loving parents.
I also question the knowledge of having the six already and being a single mom, then getting the procedure having 8 more join the house. I know quite a few single mothers and even though they have only 2 or 3 kids, they find it hard enough to get through each day and these moms hold down good jobs. I also realize everyone is different. Maybe Nadya can indeed be a true supermom. I personally will think she's going to be very overwhelmed. I think she needed to do a reality check before becoming pregnant.
Nadya will have fourteen and while she may have help now, she's going to be bogged down so much with the needs of her babies and other kids, how is she going to be able to complete her Masters, let alone give each of these kids the attention they deserve? She says she'll be able to provide because she'll have a good job. I hope she has something lined up already because people are losing their jobs left and right, and this woman expects to get in the workforce with her fourteen kids? God bless her for her gumption and I hope she proves me wrong. I also hope the father is active in the kids' daily lives. She and the kids will need that.
One last thing that I see as a big red flag is she always wanted children because of what she lacked in her childhood.
That was always a dream of mine, to have a large family, a huge family, and I just longed for certain connections and attachments with another person that I really lacked, I believe, growing up,” she replied.
Is this a responsible reason for a woman to keep bringing children into the world (without a partner), especially when you are of the belief you are going to do it as a single mother? (Before anybody thinks it, no, I'm not knocking single moms. I have a deep and true respect for single moms) But, I think if you want a huge family, and you already have six, then, you need to be mature enough to have your future planned out a bit more and make sure the enviornment for the large brood is healthy one and you are able to take care of the needs for each child. And, the kids deserve to have a stable father figure in their lives. Personally, I believe you bring children into this world because you know you can provide the love and care to raise them to be productive, healthy individuals who follow God's word in their daily life. Granted, there are a lot of accidental pregnancies and those kids are well cared for and loved, but Nadya seems like she had a plan all along. She knew she was going to bring into the world at least six more and do it knowing she'd be a single mom.
My prayers are with Nadya's children. I hope they are provided for and will live in a healthy and loved environment.
Well, somehow this single mother has managed to take care of 6 kids and go to school. THAT is a feat. So I guess we'll just have to see how she can handle 14.
Up until this point it wasn't her I was judging, it was the doctor who performed the IVF. But I believe she said that each of the other times, she had six embyros implanted and never ended up with more than twins. So I guess they just didn't expect that she would get pregnant with octuplets. But just as everyone has already mentioned, I will wait until more of the story comes out before I form an opinion.
I do hope that her family, friends and church will help her. It's sad how she's been so harshly criticized before anyone knew any real information. I mean, its fine to get into a discussion about the morality and ethics of IVF but to offer death threats to someone you don't know or know very little about? That's scary.
This all sounds like the jokey subplot of a doctor drama on tv.
Woman comes in to a clinic already pregnant with eight, trailing her six young children behind her. Cue looks of incredulity on the faces of the staff.
It almost seems inevitable that something like this would happen.
If you have enough money you can have almost anything done.
Just now in the news is the 60 year old giving birth to twins and the woman with double k, or whatever, breast implants.
If this had happened on her first try people might have been more sympathetic. But after spending who knows how many thousands of dollars on the six she already had and still going back for more, I don't think people will be as eager to help her. Of course, nobody would want to see the kids suffer so I'm sure they will be taken care of one way or another.
Is this a responsible reason for a woman to keep bringing children into the world (without a partner), especially when you are of the belief you are going to do it as a single mother?
I don't honestly think it's ever very responsible to plan a child in the hopes of filling something that's missing in your life. Sure, that's a component of most peoples' choice to have children, but the main reason should be what you can do for the child, not what the child can do for you.
I haven't been able to watch the video, as I'm at work, so I don't know...it sounds like she comes off saner than you would think she is, based on her actions. I do think she's delusional; maybe she doesn't have a medical diagnosis but her actions are not that of a mentally healthy person. The needs of all 14 of her children are going to be enormous - I'm not sure how she's managed with the six she has already. Even if the financial aspect works out somehow, there is so much more that goes in to raising even one child. She is going to need a LOT of help. I hope she gets it; there is no reason to punish those children for her actions.
Did she say if she planned to have more? Because I totally wouldn't put it past her.
I'm sorry, and some people may think this is harsh of me to say, but she seems like a very selfish person to use children to fill a void in her life. After the first and second child that should have done a lot to fill her time and her voids. Why wouldn't she wait until she was more financially stable to fill that void? If she was thinking of the children she would have. I don't buy it not for one minute.
Kinley, you said "...she seems like a very selfish person to use children to fill a void in her life." I can see your point and had not thought of that before. Maybe that is the problem with a lot of people in the world having kids though and living vicariously through their childs experiences. Whether its forcing your daughter to take piano lessons because you never did, or making your son play football when he doesn't want to, I can see how a lot of parents do this to some extent. With the octuplets mom it seems intensified and more manic-- from what I can see, it is not a normal response at all...
I appreciate your honesty, Kinley-- it made me think more critically about this!
To expand on what Kikibee said: http://news.aol.com/health/article/60-year-old-has-twins/332256
IMO, for someone this old (or even older, like the 72-year-old grandmother who got treated to have more of her own kids) to get deliberately pregnant is selfish. Chances are fairly good that you're not going to be around before the kids become legal adults--why put an innocent life through that? The ONLY reason: To fill a void in your own life, no matter what the cost to your offspring.
It reminds me of when I lived in Florida and wrote a newspaper story about pet adoptions. One of the shelters told me how it was quite common for elderly "snowbirds" (people who temporarily move to a warm state during the winter months) to go adopt a cat at the beginning of the season, and then bring the cat back to the shelter in the spring so that the person could go back up north animal-free. Then repeat the cycle next winter, with a different hapless kitty. Totally selfish, and a little cruel.
As for the Octo-Mom: She did come across as intelligent and articulate. But in this case, it's not her demeanor but what she actually says that seems to indicate some kind of mental problem (having kids to fill the void of being an only child being one example.)
I'm with you on that Kinley!
I also agree with what Kinley said. I know I may be judging her harshly, but, yes. I get delusional and selfish vibes from her.
Right now, she thinks she's got it in the bag. I wonder if TLC's cameras will be around when she's got all 14 at home and all eight babies are squalling to be fed and the two year old's diaper needs to be changed. I'm willing to bet her calm, cool, "Screw all you people. I got this" demeanor changes.
I kind of feel sorry for the Octo-Mom. My twins keep me really busy and I have family help. The Octo-Mom is going to need lots of help once ALL the babies come home.
It is a miracle that all the babies are healthy and doing good.
I just saw on the news that as a result of what Octuplet Mom said in her interview today about having six embryos implanted EACH time she got pregnant (and that this is the only time that one or two babies was not the result), the State of California is launching an investigation into what fertility clinic would participate in this practice.
This situation could lead to laws such as the one in Great Britain which limits the implantation of more than two embryos in each cycle.
Too bad her other kids aren't old enough to be "buddies". Think of all she could save on childcare.
6 each time? Wow. So some of the octuplets are identical?
I just cannot fathom how with a masters degree she thinks she will be able to support all those children. She said she wanted to be there always for her children, holding them and loving them - how is she realistically going to have much time to do that with all those children? And I am not sure that a daycare is the most hygienic, protective environment that eight premature babies need.
I respect her tenacity in defending herself, and am sure she does love all of her children. I wouldn't have selectively reduced, either. However, my overall thought as I watched this interview was that I wondered how much counseling the woman received before going through this process (asking, of course, since she is getting a masters in counseling).
I hate to judge her, too. It's hard not to, and like others here, I have a strong feeling of something being "not right" with this situation. I feel the most for all 14 children. They have a tough road ahead.
I think there exists a strong ethical issue here that will ultimately come down to women who choose fertility treatments be more carefully evaluated and even perhaps mandating how many fetus' a woman can safely carry. I also believe that you need to provide financial proof that you can pay for your own care and the care of all the babies in the NICU. I firmly feel that is not something that the government should be expected to cover.
Nine lives were at stake, and while we don't know how many embryos were implanted, at some point in time when does medical advice become legally mandated and reduction is forced?
The likelihood is the children will have medical issues and that cost, including her pregnancy is absorbed by tax payers.
Just because science CAN produce 6,7 or 8 babies, does not mean it should.
Two totally unrelated observations
Did anyone else think she looked like Angelie Jolie? Why do I think she had plastic surgery?
Generally I am opposed to government getting involved in medical decisions. The countries that limit IVF transfers to 1 or 2 also have national health insurance. Wonen in US mostly pay for IVF themselves so there is financial pressure to get a bigger bang for the buck. That being said, the current medical practice is 1 or 2 with up to 4 after failed cycles. There is a high rate of twinning with IVF. Certain procedures such as assisted hatching can raise rate to 10%. It would be very bold to lie on national TV but I still wonder if she used black market fertility drugs and artificial insemination. I find it hard to believe that's doctor would transfer 6 each time! That doctor should lose their license. It is so odd that she just showed up at kaiser like that.
I think my cold medicine is making me think of these conspiracy theories.
I have nothing bad to say about this mom. More info needed. She is pretty, she speaks softly and with intelligence....I cannot say anything unkind about a mom seen for just a few minutes on TV. When she's been on TV as long as Kate, I'm sure we will all be more able to state an opinion.
Didn't remind me of Angie Jolie, but if she wanted a big family wonder why she didn't adopt?
Fiona,
She probably didn't adopt because she wouldn't qualify. The rules are really strict for adoption.
I try not to judge her. She is going to a very busy mom with all those kids though. I sure hope that once all the babies are home that she has plenty of help. I just can't imagine having to take care of eight infants.
I think there exists a strong ethical issue here that will ultimately come down to women who choose fertility treatments be more carefully evaluated and even perhaps mandating how many fetus' a woman can safely carry.
Hi Fiona, I agree that there should definitley be a limit on how many eggs can be implanted (I dont know what the limit is currently) but once the fetus is there it shouldnt be up to the doctor as to whether or not the mother can carry it. Personally, I couldnt bring myself to reduction. It would be a hard decision for anyone I imagine
"She probably didn't adopt because she wouldn't qualify. The rules are really strict for adoption."
The adoption screening process probably would have uncovered this woman's obsession with having babies to fulfill whatever she believes she didn't have in her less than ideal childhood. That would be a red flag in any psychological evaluation about the prospective parent's ability to focus on the needs of the children versus their own unresolved issues.
This woman had six children and still pursued a HOM pregnancy that endangered not only the lives of the unborn children, but her own life as well, with no regard for potentially leaving her 6 children without a mother if she hadn't survived the dangerous pregnancy. I think the fact that she had so little regard for her existing children that she would pursue this risky pregnancy when she was the only parent in their lives indicates more than poor judgment on her part.
The Associated Press has uncovered quite a bit of information about this woman that indicates the image she's attempting to create for herself in the media is just that, an image, not the reality. According to documents obtained by the AP from the CA Division of Worker's Compensation, she received a total of $165,000 in payments for an on the job back injury that she claimed left her in "near constant pain" and unable to work between 2002-2008. And yet during this same time, she had several pregnancies. How does someone who's unable to work due to near constant back pain carry one pregnancy after another, including one with HOMs?
Fortunately, the CA Medical Board is investigating the circumstances of this birth, and I hope there will be further investigations into this woman's ability to provide the necessary care and support for 8 newborns and 6 children under 7 years old.
AP article: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090207/ap_on_re_us/octuplets
I read that she has two sets of twins among the octuplets. How rare is that?
VOR said...
Two totally unrelated observations
Did anyone else think she looked like Angelie Jolie?
______________
Yes VOR, the first time I saw her, that's exactly what I thought....she resembles Angelina Jolie.
I watched the online clips of the interview. I'm not sure what to think about her. She seemed to have her stuff together but how together can you be when facing raising 14 kids on your own? I'd be a basket case!
Here's an AP Q&A article that I just found. It seems pretty straightfoward, but still a lot of questions are unanswered concerning this lady.
http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5gk5KXq2_U9mK8pC35kWUdRweEY0QD966ACG00
Sadly other people will be raising her children and paying for them as well. Someone has to watch the kids when she's in school and paying her bills when she's jobless. I think this mother is selfish of her lifelong dream to being a mother of a large abode and she's expecting her family, friends and her church to pay for everything. I feel sorry for her. I'm glad I don't live in California anymore because Cali tax payers are paying for her medical bills and all her 8 babies. Sorry California.
Warning. I will be ranting.
My first thought on seeing Nadya Suleman was that she had obvious plastic surgery on her nose and lips. Yes, I could see a slight resemblance to Angelina Jolie, but in a grotesque, Michael Jackson way (was the c-section done via her mouth? Because her lips looked like Kate Gosselin's jowls of a dog to me) and I would not be flattered if I were AJ. I do not share the opinion that she is attractive or that the "camera loves her" for her photogenic qualities. I think ANY camera loves her for the story she is telling with them honed in on her. More false love. Excessive plastic surgery is a disorder in itself (even though she denies having any). Piggy back that on top of her insatiable need to have children in order to feel fulfilled, and there is a recipe for disaster. Again, little lives created that are completely innocent due to the lack of common sense and foresight by a wannabe supermom and an unethical doctor.
Keep in mind that she is probably on pain medication after her c-section, so might appear a bit calmer, mellow. Many mentally ill people can be extremely articulate as well as manipulative. If she had truly felt that she would be able to provide for them with her schooling, family, friends and church support, then why not just keep the privacy settings on your life as high as possible and get on with the task of raising them. One does NOT do a major television interview and hire a publicist if they aren't fishing for millions in lucrative TV deals a la sponsorships, reality shows, first photos, etc.
Hopefully whatever investigation that is going to be carried out will result in her getting help for that empty, unable-to-be-filled hole within, and allow those children, all 14 of them, to grow up without the rampant intrusiveness of a television crew and media attention. We do not need another show about multiples or other unusual or large families. Once a year specials would satiate the curiosity factor that this situation creates without disrupting little lives by filming all aspects, all the time. And I'm not even certain THAT is OK anymore.
End of rant. For now.
I feel sorry for this woman's parents. I don't know that they signed up for this. She acts like no one should question her choices. I saw a reporter talking to her mother, and she seemed less that thrilled. She already is taking care of the other six. Her parents appear to be the ones who are "present" for her children. Her interview was predominately about what "I" have always wanted. I think that says it all.
Indianprincess: I'm glad I don't live in California anymore because Cali tax payers are paying for her medical bills and all her 8babies. Sorry California.
We appreciate the sympathy, :-)
I had my taxes done early this year. I usually get a decent refund. This year it's $1,900 (which believe me I have spent 40 different ways). California has put a 30-day hold on all refunds, however, due to our cash shortage. I know it's my own fault. I should increase my deductions and not count on my little February windfall, but it's still aggravating considering it's my money.
Oh and many of our state workers are having to take two unpaid days a month to help with the budget crises. It's crazy.
So, I guess you can say from a selfish standpoint California taxpapers would appreciate a little help from whomever is interested in her story and wants to contribute.
Meaghan, you got your avatar. Looks great! I enjoyed your rant. I haven't made up my mind on all this yet, but I think you make some solid points.
Thank you, Anya. I like it too, as it reminds me of my grandfather (who called me Petunia, lol), and who would have kicked my behind into next year if I ever did something like this to his great grandchildren.
The Blogger issue seemed to be a firewall issue, and needed a reboot and some tinkering.
Meaghan, great points on the plastic surgery sickness and mentally ill patients being able to articulate well even though they have mental illness. It is manipulative.
Reality hasn't set in and right now her octuplets are being cared for by doctors and nurses. She truly has no idea what's going to hit her.
I don't see why people (and I'm not talking about you, I mean people in general) would automatically assume that she's equipped to handle a reality tv show either. Or, that she's going to automatically get one. I would even think TLC would want to stay away from this lady. They have to be thinking about these same issues of what we all are talking about. Just because a woman has multiples, she shouldn't be made a candidate for a reality tv show. Or, that she's mentally and physically equipped to handle one. I see a lot of issues with this woman. Most of all, her not being equipped to properly take care of her 14 kids, let alone having cameras around. Recipe for disaster indeed.
Once again, I truly feel sorry for these children.
I think she is delusional on multiple levels. It irks me that she sees people are only reacting negatively to her because she is a single mother. That is just one aspect of this crazy drama.
What disturbed me most is how she made comments about what should it matter how many she has... she loves them all and takes the time to love them. First, how will you have time for 14 kids under the age of 7 and eight of them being preemies along with graduate school coursework? Second, Ann Curry mentioned that she spends a minimum of 45 minutes a day holding each baby. That adds up to a minimum of 6 hours a day. How much of their mom are the other 6 getting??
I think the miracle in all of this is that she was able to make it to 30 weeks and almost all of the babies had relatively strong lungs. I really do hope that this family faces minimal health complications, as that would compromise the mother's time even more.
I don't see any problem with having a spokeperson or publicist. I'm sure she is getting tons if requests for interviews and such. She needs to focus her health and her children. Her parents haven't presented her in the best light so far. She would be smart not to trust them to evaluate requests. I guess I don't think that she is necessarily trying to get a reality show.
This situation is so unusual. I feel sorry for the women struggling with infertility and her being the public face of IVF.
... Typed from iPhone so spelling is wacked
Just because science CAN produce 6,7 or 8 babies, does not mean it should.
I agree, Fiona. I am uncomfortable with many things science does. "Forced reductions" makes me sick. I don't want the government dictating how many embryos should be legal to implant because I don't want to police and enforce medicine. But this is a case of malpractice to me. The doctor who did this has no sense! He put his patients' lives at risk. "First do no harm?"
Yet other women in different circumstances would require different standards than this woman because of factors such as age or the cause of the infertility. So how do we write the law about this?
It's really a tricky situation, and I only see these things getting trickier. I am on the fence about the legality of all this. Posters have brought up excellent points for consideration.
I am not on the fence about the care of these kids. I am not opposed to her seeking the two million dollars because she needs money. She needs it. I would rather see the family receive specific items like clothes, food, diapers, electricity, a home, a car, car seats, etc. than money.
I didn't know how bad things were financially in CA. I haven't been following closely.
Of course I have no idea, but her lips look unnatural and the resemblance to A. Jolie makes me suspicious, too.
I don't have as much contempt for her as I do the doctor who did the procedures. To me, she seems misguided. The doctor -- possibly unethical.
Apparently, he is being investigated too.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090207/ap_on_re_us/octuplets
By and large, fertility treatments are cash-only paying procedures. In the US there are no hard and fast rules only guidelines for fertility treatment, but the ethical standard is first "do no harm."
"Just because science CAN produce 6,7 or 8 babies, does not mean it should."
ITA. Human beings were never intended to reproduce in litters. Before fertility treatments became available, a HOM birth was extremely rare, with a low survival rate. There's a reason for that: the female body is designed to carry one baby to term in order to provide the optimal environment for long-term health and survival. The fertility specialists who have been interviewed about this woman have said that the goal of fertility treatment is always to obtain a pregnancy for one healthy baby, although there's an increased risk for twins or even triplets, which also increase the risks to the mother and babies.
This woman said: "They're my embryos, I wanted them all implanted," and therein lies the problem. An ethical fertility specialist would have refused. If a woman has no regard for the risks to her own life as well as the embryos, one would hope every fertility specialist would refuse to do more than is appropriate for that woman's situation, and every specialist interviewed to date has said they can't imagine a scenario where 8 would be appropriate. But someone, somewhere abandoned any ethical considerations and did it anyway, which proves that professional ethics alone will not prevent an unethical procedure.
First of all, I laughed out loud when this woman said that she "knows" she will be able to support her children when she gets her masters (In COUNSELING).
I have a Master's in Counseling. I work ridiculous hours a week to support myself and have about 3 different jobs that I do. I make a lot less then you would think. The mental health field is not a lucrative field (especially in the beginning, before you are licensed). Hence, why I am planning to apply for more grad school to get a doctorate
(Yep, Peri, I said it...wanna quote me?)
There is no way a Master's in Counseling is even going to remotely help her support these kids. Not fourteen as a single mother. Not even 4. She'll keep scheming and scamming to make money and someone will give it to her.
Meanwhile I think the fertility doctor should definitely be investigated.
NMD,
I agree a 110% with you on this. The whole thing is nauseating.
Several people have commented on Nadya's plastic surgery... This article tells more...
Nadya Suleman Is Angelina Jolie
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29058212/
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